Spitballin’ (or Super Pass It To Bulis: All In, if you love adventurous acronymizing) is a feature that allows us to touch on a multitude of things really fast, because in the world of hockey, there are always lots of things to find and colour. Here are a few topics that deserve mention.

Pass it to Comics is a regular collaboration between PITB and cartoonist Chloe Ezra, whose Tumblr page, Blue Soup, is a must-follow for any Canuck fan with an appreciation for quirk. Today, the Canucks put on a brave face, but secretly ache.

This game was meant to be all about Alex Burrows, as it was the 500th game of his career. For someone who started his professional career scoring just 32 points in 66 games in the ECHL, it’s a tremendous achievement. He worked his way into the Canucks lineup by being an agitating checker, but has become a sparkplug, top-line forward alongside the Sedins.

The Predators ruined everything, however, by not letting Burrows score 5 goals so someone could win Safeway’s Million Dollar Score and Win. So Burrows instead celebrated by getting under an All-Star’s skin, just like old times, taking Shea Weber off the ice with a coincidental roughing minor when the Canucks were down by one. It was a savvy move, but his teammates couldn’t take advantage. His 500th game was ruined, but I still watched it. I watched this game.

Photographers take photos, but the best photographers tell stories. In sports photography, if you want your photos to be used, you’ll take shots that complement the stories already being told. The Canucks are slumping? Take photos of the team looking down. Roberto Luongo’s struggling? Take photos of the man on his belly — there will be numerous opportunities. Cody Hodgson’s centering fourth line while Mason Raymond’s getting sexy top-six icetime despite far less production?

Take a photo of Raymond and Hodgson on either side of the Sedins, with Raymond watching the results of a shift with the Sedins on the Jumbotron while Hodgson stares straight ahead, clearly miserable.

Things are tight at the top of the Anti-Fantasy standings. It appears that many of you are very talented at picking the worst players, which means if I’m the captain in a pick-up game of road hockey, I want one of you to be the other captain.

It’s not hard to spot the big mistake the Toronto Maple Leafs made in allowing Sami Salo’s 5-1 goal midway through the second period of Saturday’s game in Vancouver. With the Canucks on the powerplay, James Reimer makes a save on an Alex Edler shot, and the rebound bounces into the slot, where Matthew Lombardi has a chance to fire it the length of the ice. He whiffs on the clear, however, instead putting the puck right back on the stick of Edler at the point. The next time the Leafs touch the puck, they’re fishing it out of their net.

It was one of a salad bar of errors the Leafs served up to the Canucks.

It’s not difficult to see why many in the Toronto media call for Ron Wilson’s head on a regular basis: his team is abysmal defensively. All six Maple Leaf goals against Saturday were the result of defensive errors. Furthermore, four were the direct result of a senseless turnover, and two of those four were the result of a series of defensive errors after a senseless turnover.

Salo’s goal falls into the final category. Lombardi’s failure to ice the puck is one of two mistakes he makes on this play. Furthermore, while the flubbed clear undoubtedly enables a goal, it’s not the mistake that eventually causes it. Let’s take another look at this one:

Sunday afternoon, it was announced that the Canucks had topped a poll asking NHLers to name the most overrated team in the league. This was just after Vancouver had pulverized Toronto 6-2 and just prior to making short work of Edmonton, 5-2. One wonders: if the Canucks are truly overrated, then how much worse are these teams than they seemed?

Of course, when it comes to polls of this nature, “overrated” is little more than a synonym for “disliked”, which makes sense: the Canucks are, as we know, loathed throughout Canada, and when you consider that they’re 11-2-1 and just spent the weekend batting Toronto and Edmonton around like a ball of yarn, it’s not difficult to understand why. Canada has one good team right now, a fact of which I would bristle at being reminded, were I not a fan of that team. But I am, so I was as bristle-free as a knitted moustache when I watched this game.

The Leafs came into Vancouver having lost 9 straight games to the Canucks and were hoping to prove that they’d made the changes necessary to be successful in the West, like the American Office. Instead, they just wound up being awkward and cringe-inducing, like the British office. It was initially exciting to watch the Canucks absolutely dominate an opponent, but by the end of the game I just wanted to look away. This game was executive-produced by Ricky Gervais and Stephen Merchant. I watched this game.

Boba Fett’s Mandalorian helmet is legend. According to a Star Wars-obsessed, nutjob friend that owns a replica, it gives him a panoramic view of everything, it records videos and plays them back on command, it dispenses water, and it helps to make the assassin clone a crazy badass. It’s also a massive part of his identity: According to Wookiepedia, once, in Boba Fett: Twin Engines of Destruction, Corellian mercenary Dengar asked him to take off the helmet and reveal his face, and Fett responded, “This is my face.” Did I mention Boba Fett was a crazy badass? Because he totally is.

Fett’s helmet is one of the great collectible accessories of the Star Wars mythology. But you know what would make it an even greater collectible accessory? If someone re-painted it in 1980s Canuck colours and got Kirk McLean and Dana Murzyn to sign it. And what do you know, someone did.

Vancouver’s hockey fans have high and often unreasonable expectations for this version of the Canucks. Over the past month, the team has struggled to dominate opponents with their usual zest, and as a result, they’re compared to the living dead in the press.

This is despite being undefeated over their last ten games.

Frankly, the Vancouver Canucks don’t have real problems (besides a minority quasi-criminal element in the fan-base). What they have are the NHL equivalent of “first world problems,” or, “division wrapped up in mid-January problems.” Among these: the recent “power-outage” that has caused their league leading power-play unit to slump over the past 15 games.

The Canucks haven’t scored two powerplay goals in a game since they scored four (in eleven opportunities) against the Boston Bruins in early January. Following the game in Boston, the Canucks had scored 39 times on the power-play in 42 games. In the fifteen games since, they’ve only managed to add 7 powerplay goals to their cumulative total. What’s going on?

The most important point is that they’ve received significantly fewer powerplay chances over the past six weeks. Since their 11 opportunities against Boston, the Canucks have seen only 40 man advantage situations. That’s their lowest total over a 15-game stretch since the lockout (the next closest was a stretch from February 1st to March 3rd last season, where they only received 43 powerplay opportunities). In part, the decrease in opportunities received corresponds with a general, league-wide trend, but I’d suggest to you that there are other, unique factors at play as well.

Most Cody Hodgson talk in this city centers around two things: the observation that he’s incredible, which is accurate, and the notion that Alain Vigneault has yet to figure this out. Most recently, this came up when Vigneault placed Mason Raymond with Ryan Kesler and David Booth on the second line while assigning Hodgson to centre Byron Bitz and Maxim Lapierre on the fourth. Admittedly, this was a curious move. Whither Mason Raymond?

Here’s what I know for sure: Alain Vigneault knows more about hockey than I do. One of the things that continually bewilders me is the perception that Hodgson’s success has come in spite of him, as though one of the league’s best coaches is unaware that the young centre is a natural scorer. Believe me — he knows and, as Thomas Drance illustrated beautifully awhile back, he clearly knows how to use Hodgson. That in mind, it’s probably smarter to investigate his reasoning in this instance than to assume I know more about running the Canucks than he does.

When I talk about the Vancouver Canucks and rivalries, different team names will emerge. Younger fans will talk about the Chicago Blackhawks and their recent playoff clashes with the Canucks, while some fans caught up in the exuberance of last year’s Stanley Cup Final and the heated regular season re-match will talk about the Boston Bruins.

Fans with slightly longer memories will point to the Calgary Flames, and for good reason. There is the geographical proximity to consider, but more importantly, the Canucks and Flames have met up in the playoffs a half-dozen times, including three straight seasons in the early 80′s. Their first-round match-ups in 1989, 1994, and 2004 were particularly important, as the winner in those 7-game series went on to the Stanley Cup Final each time.

But here’s a name that you might not have considered: the Seattle Totems. One of the Canucks earliest rivals may be on their way to being revived in the Emerald City.

We at PITB have a longstanding anti-cancer bias. That may be a controversial stance, but we’ll stand by it. Cancer sucks. But actions speak louder than words; fortunately, there’s a way to take action that involves playing hockey. Tomorrow at noon, the Canadian Cancer Society will be launching Road Hockey to Conquer Cancer for 2012 in Vancouver at Rogers Arena.

Roberto Luongo can get a bad rap for the way he deals with the media, but he’s not nearly as bad as you’ve heard. Sure, he’s never going to match Cory Schneider’s “well-spoken and friendly ginger” schtick (I think it’s a ruse, by the way), but Luongo actually has a great, dry, sense of humour and is quite comfortable making fun of himself in the right situation. Unfortunately, this dry sense of humour tends to show itself at the wrong times and, coupled with Luongo’s mumbled, straight delivery, often leads to misunderstanding and controversy.

But in the right situation, Luongo’s comic ability really shines, such as in segments with James Duthie, Cabbie, and, recently, comedian Gerry Dee:

It’s been a month since the Canucks lost a game in regulation but, going into Wednesday night, it had also been 3 weeks since the Canucks won a game in regulation at home. The Canucks had gone to overtime in 4 straight home games, seemingly intent on giving their home fans more than their money’s worth.

Not in this game. Against the Avalanche, the Canucks stiffed their home crowd by only giving a 60-minute effort. Even worse, one of those minutes came after the Canucks extended their lead to two with an empty net goal, meaning Canucks fans only got to watch 59 minutes of meaningful hockey. Really, we should complain.

I watched this game.

In case you haven’t heard, the Chicago Blackhawks are going through a pretty rough patch right now. A 3-2 loss to the Nashville Predators Tuesday night was their 9th in a row.

To make matters worse, the tilt versus the Preds was the 7th of 9 straight road games for Chicago, so they won’t be playing on fresh legs any time soon. Worse, the group staggers into New York to face the NHL-leading Rangers Thursday before ending the road trip Saturday versus the Blue Jackets — perhaps the only time a team has looked forward to playing in Columbus.

When the Blackhawks began this losing streak, they were perched comfortably atop the NHL with 64 points. 9 games later, their 65 points have them dangling perilously on the precipice of the postseason cutoff, only three points up on the 9th-place Calgary Flames.

With a run of haplessness like this, it’s not surprising to hear many calling for drastic changes all across the board. Trade Patrick Kane for Ryan Miller. Fire the coach. Blow up the core. Fire the guy whose job is fire the coach and blow up the core. Reduce the population by one-third. Eat the living.

These are rash decisions, but the best solution might be even more rash: breathe deep, and take a page from the Vancouver Canucks.

With just two goals in regulation and only 46 shots total, Monday night’s game against the Phoenix Coyotes wasn’t exactly the epitome of entertainment. Fortunately, Canucks fans can count on Kevin Bieksa to liven things up, though he normally does so with his comments in interviews.

Near the end of the third period, Bieksa tried to get fancy with an iced puck, flipping it off the boards and attempting to catch it behind his back. He came just short of succeeding when linesman Mark Wheler stepped in to help him out…

It’s been said that the first game back from a road trip is really better considered the last game of the road trip, that it’s not a true home game if you still spend time on a plane the day prior. There was certainly evidence to this theory Monday night, as the Canucks’ first contest in Rogers Arena since the second of February bore an eerie resemblance to the games they played abroad during the 10 days between.

Sure, they were in their home blues, they went home to their own beds, and they were the team surrendering the late, game-tying goal, but everything else about the song remained the same — tight game, sloppy defensive zone breakouts, the absence of Sedinery and, for the fifth time in six outings, a shootout. By now, we’re beginning to wonder if the Canucks are addicted to shootouts. Do they get irritable after regulation victories? Is there a patch or a gum to help ease the cravings? These are the questions I was left with after I watched this game.

Look out, holidayblues: invisibleairwaves is coming for you.

If you’ve been following the Anti-Fantasy League posts each week, you will have noticed holidayblues consistently atop the leader board. She has had sole possession of first place since Week 4, excepting Week 9 when Joeducklow managed to tie her briefly before falling back 9 points the following week.

Invisibleairwaves, however, has been gradually gaining ground. A few weeks ago, he was 11 points back. Last week, he was just 5 points behind holidayblues. This week, he’s just one point away from first place.

Dale Weise’s rookie campaign has to be considered a minor success. Sure, we could dwell on the things that he’s failed to do, such as provide much in the way of energy or offense (apart from a spiffy end-to-end rush versus the Ottawa Senators). And, despite dropping the gloves a handful of times, Weise has been far from the intimidating rat poison the Canucks have needed.

Still, the former Ranger has been quietly effective in his first full season. Despite his inexperience, Weise has done a great job keeping the puck out of his own net and moving it out from the defensive zone, where he starts most of his shifts. As fourth line wingers go, he’s been one of the most competent and defensively sound the Canucks have iced since the lockout. Frankly, his ability to not suck has been a breath of fresh air.

Of course, quiet effectiveness isn’t exactly what you want from your energy guy, and after seeing what Mike Duco has managed to do in that same role, it’s hard to argue that Duco shouldn’t be the new Dale Weise.

Spitballin’ (or Super Pass It To Bulis: All In, if you love adventurous acronymizing) is a feature that allows us to touch on a multitude of things really fast, because in the world of hockey, there are always lots of things to find and colour. Here are a few topics that deserve mention.

This past fall, the NHL joined the NBA, the MLB, and the NFL in partnering with Bleacher Creature Toys, a company based in Pennsylvania that turns the sporting world’s most popular athletes into plush dolls. Now, anybody can snuggle up with a Sidney Crosby, Henrik Lundqvist, or Patrick Kane doll, provided they’re willing to drop $25. (Of course, you could probably do that with the real Patrick Kane for free, especially if you’re an unbelievable blonde.)

There are currently 23 Bleacher Creatures available in the NHL store, and 3 of them are Canucks: Henrik Sedin, Daniel Sedin, and Ryan Kesler. They’re all terrible.

Going into this game, the Canucks hadn’t lost in regulation in 8 games and had gone to overtime in 5 of their last 6 games. According to their record over their last 10 games, the Canucks were the hottest team in the NHL. According to anyone who actually watched those games, the Canucks were playing some of their worst hockey of the season.

Hey, I watched those games. Then I watched this game.

The Sedins had a pretty eventful offseason. It started with a riot. Then, a week later, they flew to Las Vegas, where Daniel Sedin was awarded both the Ted Lindsay and Art Ross trophies. In Sweden, they did some serious inline skating. And in July, they flew to the Swedish island of Öland, where they were awarded the Victoriastipendiet — effectively, the Swedish athlete of the Year award. Daniel and Henrik were the first hockey players to win the award since Peter Forsberg in 1994, and only the third since the award debuted in 1979. Elite company.

While the Sedins were in Öland, the identical twins were asked by Östran, a local newspaper, to take part in a strange experiment: draw self-portraits, in order to see if those would be identical too. I can’t believe I only found this now, but here are the results.

Despite his recent run of incredible play, the Vancouver market remains habitually critical of Roberto Luongo. The chronic frustration with the team’s incumbent starter has led to numerous suggestions that the team keep young blue-chip netminder Cory Schneider, who’s still got that new car smell, and trade Luongo instead.

By now, the goalie controversy is old hat, so let’s give credit to Ed Willes for putting a novel spin on it yesterday, with an extremely interesting take in the Province. Willes’s column doesn’t rely on any hackneyed arguments about Luongo’s lack of “mental toughness,” but rather, suggests Luongo has accrued too much mileage, and that Gillis might be best served by sticking with the fresher legs in Cory Schneider.

Out of curiosity, I figured I’d test Willes’s central assumption: does the performance of an NHL goaltender fall off sharply after they eclipse the 20,000 shots-against mark?