David Perron was drafted 26th overall in 2007, a fact that you probably already knew, since the Canucks had the pick right before that, and chose… poorly. This has a tendency to come up.
It definitely came up on Monday night, when the Canucks lost to the Edmonton Oilers, Perron’s current team (who also had two opportunities to draft him, instead picking Alex Plante and Riley Nash, but that doesn’t fit the narrative, so let us digress). Perron was the difference in this one, registering a hat trick, henceforth known as a Perron cocktail. (HEYO!)
So if you think about it, the Canucks really lost this game in 2007. Why did they even bother showing up for this game? It’s been decided for seven years! And why did I even bother watching this game? We will never know. But I watched this game.
Canucks 2 – 4 Oilers
- After missing most of the season with an ankle injury, Jordan “Tiny Dancer” Schroeder returned to the lineup Monday night versus Edmonton, and the diminutive forward brought a very important element to the Canuck lineup: luck. If you’re wondering where it’s been for the Canuck forwards this season, turns out it’s been with Schroeder the whole time, walking along the beach with him, and carrying him when there’s only one set of footprints.
- Schroeder got the Canucks on the board midway through the first. He was attempting a low-percentage pass through two Oilers, hoping it might get through to Jannik Hansen in the slot. But instead, the puck banked off Corey Potter, then off Ilya Bryzgalov’s goal stick and in. Very lucky. Any other Canuck would have been unlucky enough to see that pass somehow get to Hansen.
- Full credit to David Booth on that goal, by the way. Schroeder only has this puck because Booth comes barreling in and knocks Anton Belov off of it with a full-body check. It’s especially easy to appreciate Booth’s power here if you catch Schroeder’s attempt to do the same thing to Jesse Joensuu a split-second earlier. Joensuu doesn’t even move. It’s like George of the Jungle hitting a tree.
- Schroeder’s second made the game 2-2, which allowed John Shorthouse to say “deuces are wild in Rogers Arena”. Or at least that’s what he meant to say. What he actually said was “douches are wild in Rogers Arena”, which I don’t think is a real thing. Unless maybe it’s from one of the new Pokemon editions.
- But the best part of that play was that the biggest idiot ever who stood up and turned his back to the play to have his two seconds of TV time missed it. Way to go, guy. You’re the biggest idiot ever.
- Daniel Sedin and Alex Burrows skated with Brad Richardson for much of this game, which means Henrik Sedin is currently being replaced by Brad Richardson. It’s depressing if you think of it that way. So I like to think of it thusly: Daniel and Burrows are merely playing with a centre commensurate with their recent production. Actually, that’s equally depressing.
- Zack Kassian continues to be as hot and cold as the subject of that one Katy Perry song, an inconsistency that was best demonstrated in his last shift of the game. After dangling beautifully around an Edmonton forechecker at the Vancouver blueline, Kassian turned the puck over at the Edmonton blueline when a clean zone entry was a must: Luongo had already abandoned the net like an irresponsible parent, and it embraced the puck like the puck was a much-needed father figure.
- Speaking of father figures, Dan “Community Man” Hamhuis got into it with Nail Yakupov, which makes complete sense. We can only assume Hamhuis was simply trying to mentor a troubled youngster, and Yakupov went full Full House and was all, “You can’t tell me what to do! You’re not my father!“
- Finally, this game was a win for the statheads, who posit that starting a goaltending on both nights of a back-to-back yields a lesser performance in his second night. For that reason, Dallas Eakins started Ilya Bryzgalov despite Ben Scrivens getting the win for Edmonton Sunday versus the Predators. Meanwhile, Roberto Luongo got the consecutive starts. But if you ask me, the real problem was that Mike Sullivan couldn’t go to his backup team.
, I Watched This Game