I Find This Photo Odd: Zack Kassian puts Rob Klinkhammer to sleep

When Raffi Torres left Vancouver for Phoenix, we wondered aloud if the Canucks had anybody on the payroll that could replace what he brought. Two years later, I think it’s safe to say that Zack Kassian is the closest we’ve come. But it’s not just that he’s a big, bruising forward with soft hands, or that he’s a little bit insane. It’s also that photogenic face.

I don’t mean photogenic in the usual sense. It’s not that Kassian’s looks good in photographs, or that his features are stand out in some special way. But a photo of Zack Kassian is likely to be hilarious, much more so than your usual hockey player, in much the same way a photo of Raffi Torres was almost a sure-fire laugher.

And as it turns out, Kassian’s amusing photogenicity is somewhat transferrable. His mere presence in a picture can turn those around him into hilarious comedy props. Case in point, this shot from Monday night of Kassian and Coyotes forward Rob Klinkhammer, which is amazing:

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Breakdowning Ryan Kesler’s mess of a game-winning goal versus the Coyotes

Mike Smith was dynamite Monday night, making 40 saves as Vancouver peppered him with chance after chance. The Canucks managed to beat him three times, with two called back — one for goaltender interference and the other for a distinct kicking motion.

Smith was playing so well that you’d expect only the prettiest of goals to beat him. Instead, the Canucks won the game thanks to indecision, falling down, a flubbed shot, and missing an open net.

Quick, skilful passing plays that lead to goals often get described as tic-tac-toe. This play needs an easier child’s game than that: let’s go with Candy Land. Like Candy Land, it was completely random, with no one really deserving to win. Ryan Kesler just happened to draw the right cards to reach Candy Castle and rescue King Kandy first. There’s no glory in that. And yet, Kesler still celebrated the game-winner appropriately: like a three-year-old.

Let’s break down the madness, shall we?

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