Roberto Luongo watches Real Housewives during most uneventful game ever

Originally, I considered filing this picture of Roberto Luongo at the Vancouver Canucks’ bench under the “I find this photo odd” feature, but truthfully, I only find the caption odd. According to Getty Images, in this photo, “Roberto Luongo of the Vancouver Canucks checks the replay on his iPad during their NHL game against the Columbus Blue Jackets at Rogers Arena March 26, 2013.”

But that can’t be right. Why would any non-masochistic person replay any portion of Tuesday night’s game? It made Season 1 of Treme look like Season 4 of The Wire, that’s how dry that game was.

Granted, if that’s actually what Luongo is doing, it might explain why he looks so unenthused. But still, it’s hard to believe a man could have access to an iPad during this game and use it only to enhance his viewing of the game, especially when the game seemed unenhanceable.

Paul Bissonnette of the Phoenix Coyotes suspected that, maybe, Luongo was using the iPad for another purpose:

 

That would make a lot of sense, really. We all know how Luongo likes his reality television, and upon closer inspection of the iPad, the replay he’s watching does appear to have a suspicious amount of leopard print.

See, that looks a lot like Reiko, who appeared on season 1, but not season 2. But what do I know? I don’t watch the show. What gave you the impression that I did?

For all I know, that could be Dalton Prout on the screen, because I don’t know what Dalton Prout looks like.

You really couldn’t blame Luongo for wanting to switch channels in this one. Even John Shorthouse took at shot at the game’s blandness as he pointed out how late it had gone for fans in Columbus. “Overtime begins at 12:29 Eastern. But you’d have to stay up. I mean, there’s no way you could’ve gone to sleep watching this.”

I will say this: as dry as the Canuck have been during this five-game win streak, they’ve also won five games in a row. I know Alain Vigneault can do nothing right in the eyes of many in this fanbase, and he’s now being blamed for tearing at the very fabric of hockey itself, but his first priority is coaching the Canucks into the postseason, and the adjustments he’s made to keep his shorthanded club competitive have paid off.

Tuesday night, these adjustments may have helped lull everyone to sleep, but the club also defended near perfectly, and dominated from a possession standpoint. A complete performance like that is only possible with full team buy-in, so I think this recent run serves to illustrate that AV continues to have the ear of every player in the room.

That said, this was still an easy game to hate, and even moreso if you don’t like the guy behind the Canucks’ bench.

So was Luongo watching Real Housewives? He didn’t exactly deny the suggestion. Shortly after the game, he responded:

Agreed.

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10 comments

  1. Zach Morris
    March 27, 2013

    No, Luongo! In the time honoured tradition of letting successful people do whatever they want, you can only joke and have fun when you’re winning!

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    Rating: +5 (from 11 votes)
  2. BakerGeorgeT
    March 27, 2013

    Maybe he was posting on a hockey forum, telling people how bad Schneider looks out there. “What’s a shut out worth these days anyway? It’s time to trade him to a team LIKE Dallas for Loui Eriksson. Personally I like people named Loui.”

    VA:F [1.9.16_1159]
    Rating: +17 (from 23 votes)
  3. Kenahora
    March 27, 2013

    Great game …never under-estimate the opposition . Those who complain about the dullness …should look in the mirror… first … Therein lies the real problem .

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    Rating: +2 (from 4 votes)
  4. DanD
    March 27, 2013

    I must admit, I thought you said season 4 of The Voice, and I was like, “Yeah! Totally!”

    I’m going to give you the benefit of the doubt and assume The Wire is an exciting show.

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    Rating: -2 (from 4 votes)
  5. shoes
    March 27, 2013

    The game was bad on some levels, not great passing, no great rushes, however if you watch any games besides the Canucks you would know that many games are played like this and for about 10 teams its the norm. We have just been spoiled in Canucksville with Sedinery and Burrowsery.

    Kanucks are missing Kesler, more than some fans care to admit.

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    Rating: +7 (from 7 votes)
  6. K Sherman
    March 27, 2013

    The ACC Bullies, or the toronto maple GOONS. Pick your most appropriate name. They are now the dirtiest team in hockey history. The Philadelphia Flyers of the 1972-73 season, considered the all time goons of hockey, have just been surpassed by the maple GOONS. The 1972 Flyers had players which included Dave Schultz, Andre (the Train) Dupont, Gary Dornhoefer, Bob Kelly, Joe Saleski, etc, etc .(at the time considered the goons of goons), have just been topped by the toronto maple GOONS. The Flyers had a record of less than one fight per game. The maple GOONS now have a record of more than one fight per game. Canadians will be proud to know that the “City of Brotherly HATE” (toronto) considers the maple GOONS CANADA’S TEAM. I suppose that GOON nation has to pay for violence seeing that the can’t pay exorbitant ticket prices for a winning team. I’m sure GOON nation is proud.

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    Rating: -8 (from 8 votes)
    • mac 'n cheese
      March 27, 2013

      Do we get prizes for using the “secret word” now? Is “GOON” the secret word?

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      Rating: +2 (from 2 votes)
    • ryan kesler
      March 29, 2013

      Read your comment over again when your sober……see how dumb it sounds

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      Rating: 0 (from 0 votes)
  7. J21 (@Jyrki21)
    March 28, 2013

    I think we’re all supposed to scream when he says it — it’s what Pee-Wee’s genie (Jason Giambi? Was that his name?) spat out this morning.

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    Rating: +1 (from 1 vote)
  8. Martin St. Louis
    March 29, 2013

    Our defense is now stacked, and we just gave birth to a stellar goalie. Our only problem at the moment is the big crap hole in our offence……… Hole in Offence + Good defense + Stellar Goalie = Low scoring game wins

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    Rating: 0 (from 0 votes)