Cole’s Notes: Canucks Scrimmage, January 16, 2012

Wednesday night’s scrimmage was the first quasi-game action for the Canucks since the Bieksa’s Buddies charity game in October. There was a little less excitement about this one, however, as we have the promise of actual games in the near future.

Unfortunately, we were not able to make it to the game to warm up our I Watched This Game muscles in anticipation of the start of the season, so expect some strained groins on the weekend. A number of Vancouver Sun writers, however, were in attendance, and we asked a few to send us some notes. Cam Cole, one of the finest and most well-respected sports writers in Canada, was happy to oblige.

Turns out his notes are kind of a crazy, awesome mess. Here is a peek into the mind and process of Cam Cole as PITB shares the first ever edition of Cole’s Notes:

  • File under “They (Barely) Watched This Game.”
  • Elapsed time of first 10-minute period: 12 minutes. Intermission scheduled to be 12 minutes.
  • Six shots on Luongo. 1.000 save percentage. On pace for 0.00 goals-against average. Fans quietly “Loooo” when he gloved one shot. Just occurred to me that when he comes back as a Leaf, no matter what the reaction he can always tell his teammates: “See? They still love me here.”
  • Canucks official Twitter feed says: “Game on. Full house.” First evidence of sense of humour. If 12,000 reserved tickets, as was reported on their feed earlier, half stayed home. Can’t be more than 7,000 here.
  • “Welcome Back Fans!” message in constant loop around circular top and bottom of score clock and on all four corners. New “Our Team Our Way” banners at both ends. Sounds oddly like “Our Way or the Highway.” No doubt there will be a sheet explaining the theme later on. Clearly are expecting fans to use the hashtag #OTOW whenever tweeting Canucks. Probably will, too.
  • So far, the Canucks’ Civil War — the Blue and the Grey — is extremely civil. Greys shouldn’t have a chance, based on rosters, but those Johnny Rebs are a scrappy lot.
  • Ok, not nothing, but not too much. Three penalties in the second period, to Edler, Ebbett and Higgins, no goals. One shot that looked dangerous but changed direction and may or may not have gone off Luongo’s glove before going wide. Can’t remember who shot. May have taken eye off “action” while having a moment of gastro-intestinal distress from pregame meal of assorted deep-fried, rock-hard mystery food. (And only $10!) Joey Kenward just announced that third period would be an Extended! period of 15 minutes, followed by a shootout whether the score is tied or not.
  • The atmosphere is electric in the way that wristwatch batteries are electric.
  • Golgolgolgolgolgolgolgolgolgooooooaaaallllll! 1-0 for Blue.
  • Edler moves to middle, shot redirected, waist-high tip by Hank in high slot, beats Schneider with Burrows traffic in front. This is my goal shorthand. Sorry. Habit. Sadly, I did not write down the time. Elliott says it was 3:37, and he’s never wrong.
  • Mason Raymond gets in 2-on-1, shoots wide.
  • Hansen’s shot blocked by Ballard, hobbling.
  • Ebbett off, one minute for holding. No joy on power play, although looks as though Jason Garrison is going to be a Christian Ehrhoff-type rover, judging by the way he sneaks in off point, goes to net on occasion, and shoots from half-boards.
  • Oh yeah, penalties are one minute.
  • Hansen tips Lapierre feed off post, Schneider got a piece of it.
  • The Union looks as though it may beat the Confederacy once more. The people are begging Lincoln to stop the war, and not because of casualties.
  • But no! Gray’s Andrew Ebbett wins faceoff, goes to net, pots loose puck after Raymond walks out of corner and puck goes off Barker’s skate to Ebbett. 12:50.
  • Shootout is looming. Of course, it was looming anyway.
  • But no! Alex Edler moves in from point a couple steps, double clutches, fires one glove side 14:08 (Henrik assist). Blue wins 2-1!
  • Lapierre has chance to make it 3-1 empty net but his shot from  30-feet middle of ice, goes off post.
  • Edler, Hank get two points each.
  • Shootout coming! Breathless.
  • Edler (blue) backhand deke beats Schneider 5-hole, Raymond (gray) speeds in, Luongo stops him Daniel (blue) forehand between Schneider’s legs. Gets piece of it, not enough.
  • Schroeder hits post on Luongo.
  • Schneider saves on Burrows (no deke).
  • Kassian dangles! Beats Luongo backhand deke upstairs.
  • Hank tries to be cute between legs backhand, Schneider shuts it.
  • Ebbett scores on Luongo backhand upstairs. 2-2 Hansen shoots on Schneider, saves it.
  • Ballard shot gloved by Luongo.
  • Higgins wrist top shelf stick side on Schneider.
  • Luongo stops uh … Andrew Gordon to win shootout. Blue wins 3-2.
  • Double win for Blue. Huge for Ulysses S. Grant (Rick Bowness).

Photo credits: Ian Lindsay, PNG

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6 comments

  1. jenny wren
    January 17, 2013

    A double win for Bowness blue
    A double win by Bobby Lu
    A shootout goal from Mau Mau Kass
    And Andrew Ebbet showed his class
    Beating Bobby backhand shelf
    A classic in and of itself

    ‘Twas no full house for these Canucks
    May no one show to watch the Ducks
    A boycott with a silent shout
    To state, “We were the ones locked out!
    From just this game we will abstain,
    But do not eff with us again.”

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    • krazymunky
      January 17, 2013

      why are there so many good poets on PTIB?!

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      • jenny wren
        January 17, 2013

        We speak in couplets at The Nest
        As I am sure some might have guessed
        Iambic beat we intertwine
        Through each polysyllabic line

        And now accustomed to this style
        We seek content to make you smile
        As we with thoughts do improvise
        Some ways to praise our favored guys

        Although sometimes we run amok
        And use bad words like eff and suck
        We do our best to keep it clean
        And strive to say just what we mean

        PITB we like to troll
        It’s our Canucks opinion poll
        But as to whether we are “good”
        Just middlin’ fair it’s understood

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        Rating: +10 (from 12 votes)
  2. scott
    January 17, 2013

    do you guys have a clip of Kassian’s shootout goal?

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  3. Rituro
    January 17, 2013

    I hereby petition for Rick Bowness to be forever nicknamed “Ulysses” in any and all future articles.

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    Rating: +7 (from 7 votes)
  4. BakerGeorgeT
    January 17, 2013

    We’re talking about practice here. Practice.

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    Rating: +3 (from 3 votes)