No, the Canucks are not going to buy out Roberto Luongo

When the new CBA finally gets ratified this weekend, it will reportedly include two compliance buyouts in the 2013 or 2014 off-seasons. These buyouts are designed to help teams get under the new, lower salary caps for the following seasons. The cap in 2013-14 will apparently be $64.3 million, a drop of $5.9 million from the current cap, which would potentially present a problem for those teams that spend to the cap.

Such as, for instance, the Vancouver Canucks. As is, the Canucks still have a bit of room under the revised salary cap, but have several UFAs to re-sign, the biggest being Alex Edler. The buyouts in the new CBA would give the Canucks some options for creating the necessary cap space for Edler’s raise, as well as giving them an out on any contracts that they might regret.

This brings me to something I can’t believe I actually need to say: Roberto Luongo will not be one of those buyouts.

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Canucks go home: Weise gets roaring ovation, Hansen gets lame press release

In case you’ve been living under a rock (and the underside of this rock doesn’t have any radio, television, or Internet, and you didn’t have any friends to come visit you at this rock, and also you never left the rock at any time), the NHL lockout ended yesterday. With this came the end of the overseas adventures of Jannik Hansen, Mason Raymond, Dale Weise, and Cory Schneider, who played his last game last week.

For Dale Weise, this meant end of his feel-good story in the Netherlands, which we’ve been tracking with great interest since he left. If you’ve been avoiding Canucks coverage since the lockout began, click the “Dale Weise in the Netherlands” tag to relive the whole story.

As you know from yesterday’s post (unless you don’t, in which case, reacquaint yourself), Weise did some incredible things in the Dutch League, including leading the Tilburg Trappers to the verge of a playoff spot before the new CBA forced him to sit out the game in which they could clinch it. But the Trappers won the game anyway, guaranteeing them a top-four finish in the Eredivisie.

But the big moment for Tilburg fans on Sunday wasn’t saluting the team’s successful bid to make the postseason. It was saluting Dale Weise’s tour as one of them. With Weise in attendance for the game — in plainclothes, trading his Tilburg helmet for his trademark cabbie hat — fans packed the Stappegoor IJssportcentrum Tilburg to thank him. After the game, the Trappers sent him off with a varsity jacket and a roaring ovation.

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If not for bad luck, Steve Pinizzotto would have no luck at all

Chris Tanev may have been the first person from the Rochester Institute of Technology to play in the NHL, but he wasn’t the first to sign an NHL contract. That honour goes to Steve Pinizzotto, who signed with the Washington Capitals three years before Tanev signed with the Canucks. And yet, Tanev has played 64 games in the NHL before Pinizzotto has even played one.

Plenty of players get signed to NHL contracts without ever making it to the big leagues, but this is normally because their career stalls at a lower level. Not so for Pinizzotto, who has several solid AHL seasons under his belt to go with the kind of size and demeanour that should have earned him at least a cup of coffee in the bigs. Instead, Pinizzotto has reached his 28th birthday without a single NHL game.

Clearly, Pinizzotto must have earned himself a curse from an ethnic stereotype, because he is one of the unluckiest players in hockey. Even now, as the NHL lockout finally ends, Pinizzotto’s string of bad luck continues. The NHL lockout is over, and training camp begins in less than a week. But Pinizzotto, whom the Canucks have had in mind as a fourth line option since last offseason, won’t be there.

While the CBA “negotiations” dragged on, you see, Pinizzotto suffered a groin injury. He hasn’t played a single game for the Chicago Wolves since November 24th. It’s just the latest bit of bad luck for the Bad Luck Brian of the Vancouver Canucks.

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Unreal Canucks Gif Tournament: ‘Luongo likes it, puts ring on it’ vs. ‘Sedins in Sync’

Introducing the Unreal Canucks GIF Tournament, a quest to determine which Canucks GIF is the greatest in existence. We’ve narrowed it down to 32 candidates, divided into four divisions then seeded, one through eight. Now we need your help. An important note: this isn’t just something to do while the players and the owners waste time bickering over who should get what’s left of the money they’re burning — it’s also a super-important initiative. After all, if we don’t do this, how else will we know? AND WE MUST KNOW.

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