The continuing adventures of Dale Weise in the Netherlands, which still eludes him on maps (VIDEO)

Welcome back to Pass it to Weise, the hockey blog that, no thanks to this unbelievably stupid lockout, has descended almost exclusively into updates about Dale Weise’s tour of duty in the Netherlands. Brace yourself for another white-knuckle ride!

Obviously, we wish it hadn’t come to this, both because Dale Weise isn’t exactly the most compelling Canuck and also because making this much fun of the comparative mediocrity of Netherlands hockey isn’t making us any friends over at the IJS Hockey Forum, a Dutch message board. (We see you talking about us, Joep Meijsen, and thanks to Google Translate, we even have a vague, choppy understanding of what you’re saying.)

But it cannot be helped. Weise is basically the only Canuck doing anything besides working out, and Jason Botchford has already written the definitive “the Canucks are working out” article. Plus, we do find it more than a little amusing what a big deal Weise is over there, not to mention how thoroughly he’s dominating the Dutch League, which appears to be about a step up from the Vatican Hockey League (where the team that has the pope usually wins because you’re not allowed to hit him, and the pope has mad dangles).

I mean, heck, here’s yet another documentary crew following Weise around as he does mundane tasks like gather groceries and try on hats.

What can we take away from this video? Not too much. We learn that Weise appears to make a distinction between bananas and fruit, which is concerning. We finally get confirmation that the cabbie hat he’s always sporting is indeed his favourite hat. And, like his last short feature for a news organization, Weise reiterates his still-horrifying, complete inability to find a major European country on a map.

You really shouldn’t take maps for granted, Weise. Some people don’t have maps.

But, in all fairness to Dale Weise, while he may not be delivering the entertainment in these fluffy Dutch documentaries, he’s undeniably delivering it on the ice. He’s up to 15 points in 6 games now, and he is consistently the best player on the ice. Seriously, watch this shift that leads to a Weise goal during a game versus the Geleen Eaters.

That spin move is slick.

But, lest you think all this time as a skill guy will have Weise forgetting how to play the role of the tough guy — a role he’ll be expected to resume, or potentially even compete for once he returns to Vancouver – opponent Jeffrey Martens learned the hard way that Weise still remembers how to punch.

Yesterday we touched on a fight Weise got into in his most recent game, and lamented that there was no video. But video has since surfaced, at least of the fight’s aftermatch, when Weise does a little showboating for the excited crowd:

This guy is just full of confidence right now.

I can’t wait until the next time he encounters Shawn Thornton. You don’t want to mess with me, Thornton. Did you see what I did to Jeffrey Martens? THAT COULD HAVE BEEN YOU.

All right. We promise this will be the last Dale-Weise-in-the-Netherlands update for awhile, for two reasons. Even we’re sick of it, for one. Furthermore, unless I’m reading the schedule wrong, the Trappers have a 19-day layoff before their next game on November 23rd. Holy cow.

Considering the progress being made in CBA talks, Weise’s last game may very well have been his last game in the Netherlands. I’m sure he’ll be missed.

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27 comments

  1. Nee
    November 7, 2012

    Is it mean that I chuckled at the “Dale Weise scoort!” title of the first video? I’m sorry Dutch people, I love you.

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    Rating: +9 (from 11 votes)
    • Adam Nowek
      November 7, 2012

      Dutch is the cutest language ever.

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      Rating: +1 (from 1 vote)
  2. Jacob
    November 7, 2012

    Google Translate + Dutch hockey message boards might actually get me through this lockout. “But then a different league to the dragon stabbing I find so typical american.” Where is this Dragon Stabbing league in America, and why is it not on TV more???

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    Rating: +16 (from 16 votes)
    • Nee
      November 7, 2012

      And a little later:

      “The dragon fire I do not typically American”

      “Anyway, really cucumber time there.”

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      Rating: +2 (from 2 votes)
      • Vergo
        November 8, 2012

        Cucumber time means that there’s nothing newsworthy going around so the media picks up the most random stories. Comparable to the term “silly season” ;-)

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        Rating: +2 (from 2 votes)
    • Dutch Hockey Fan
      November 8, 2012

      ‘To stab the dragon’ (in Dutch) means ‘to make fun of’. So this basically read ‘to make fun of a different league is so typically American’. Although your translation actually sounds like a lot more fun.

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      Rating: +7 (from 7 votes)
  3. Friesland Hockey
    November 7, 2012

    It’s pretty sad when an NHLer like Weiss pretends to win a fight in the Netherlands after he jumps a guy when the only punch he lands is when he suckers the guy have he tackles him to the ice like a rugby player. You got your head split open and you were icing you hand after. Martens completely fine after. Not one mark on him….I know you are trying to save yourself from further embarrassment but come on.

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    • Scott
      November 7, 2012

      Whoa – real Dutch hockey fans are coming to the blog now!

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      Rating: +4 (from 6 votes)
      • Harrison Mooney
        November 7, 2012

        Here come the Dutch hockey trolls! Time to launch PassittoBulis.nl.

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        Rating: +5 (from 9 votes)
        • Henry
          November 8, 2012

          Are you shure y’re Canadian.
          You sound more like a hard core right wing Republican.
          If you wanna know more about dutch hockey contact Brad Ziemer
          I gave him the backgounds.
          Furthermore Joep Meijsen is a well respected journalist here in the Netherlands.

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          Rating: -4 (from 8 votes)
        • shoes
          November 9, 2012

          There is no Dutch trolls…..they do not know what a mullet is, let alone how to sport one. All good trolls on this blog come complete with mullet and postal code in trailer park.

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    • Nee
      November 7, 2012

      Weise is a bit of an idiot, if his former twitter exploits are any indication.

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      Rating: +2 (from 2 votes)
      • C4NUCK
        November 7, 2012

        Weise is obviously an idiot, HE CAN’T FIND THE NETHERLANDS ON A MAP!!!! Did he grow up in a cave? Seriously, that is amazingly ignorant. Oddly enough, his simplicity is starting to grow on me. I actually want to see another Weise video just to hear some more simple ramblings. I’m fascinated by his simplicity. I mean, if you moved somewhere, wouldn’t you want to find out where it is (probably beforehand)? I would, but not Weise, NOT EVEN AFTER 5 DAYS!!! He’s truly special. Way to go PITB! Amazing speculation in your last Weise article on the Weise hat front, it really is his favourite! Man, Weise is just funny

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        Rating: +3 (from 7 votes)
  4. HumanCannonball
    November 7, 2012

    Am I the only one who doesn’t mind finding out more about Weise? I mean, we don’t know much about the guy. He doesn’t even have a decent nickname! Weise’s Pieces?

    I tried to think up a nickname for Weise earlier today, and I came up with “(U R Not) Weise,” because he wears the number 32, and the Playstation was 32-bit, and had the slogan “U R Not E,” and “E” sounds like “Weise,” and I sure do miss hockey.

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    Rating: +2 (from 6 votes)
    • Harrison Mooney
      November 7, 2012

      That’s the worst nickname attempt in history, HumanCannonball. Go to the box and feel shame.

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      Rating: +8 (from 8 votes)
  5. Nico Groen
    November 7, 2012

    I did not see mentioned anywhere here that Dale can’t keep his mouth shut against referees either, the last 2 games he only had 2 points but did accumulate a nice 37 mins in penalties. ( including a 2 games automatic suspention for the match penalty he got for the mentioned fight )
    Here’s a nickname for him … Holiday-Player…

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    Rating: +2 (from 4 votes)
  6. Tilburg
    November 8, 2012

    Ask the former NHL star Guy Lafleur about dutch hockey when he got levelled by a great hit from a dutch d-men. I’m really surprised that so called “fans” from the team you play for are so negative and denigrating about one of their own players. Says a lot about the vancouver mentality. Glad i’m living in the netherlands!!

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    Rating: -4 (from 10 votes)
  7. CAPS FOREVER
    November 8, 2012

    I’m glad you Canadians have a little laugh about our hockey league, but hé, in our hockey league they are still playing… And don’t make a mistake, we know very well our place in the world of hockey and still love to watch this game every week even if its not on your -fantastic high- level.

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    Rating: +13 (from 13 votes)
  8. Daniel Wagner
    November 8, 2012

    Holy moley, some Dutch hockey fans are awfully sensitive. Sheesh.

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    Rating: +3 (from 5 votes)
    • GvdM
      November 8, 2012

      We’re not that sensitive over here. Yes, we know, we have a little hockeyleague here, but we’re playing hockey.
      Dale Weise was big news in Tilburg, a city in the southern part of the Netherlands. Although, nobody ever heard of Weise before he got in touch with Tilburg, it was like Elvis came to town! Weise is not dominating the league, first time he played with Tilburg against a real competitor, he scored no points, and the only thing the crowd was screaming about was his fight with another Canadian. His team lost 0-5, and all Weise could do was watch. And yes, he can do that for the next 2 games, because a match in the Netherlands is an automatic suspension of two games.
      We are sure, in Canada you want to help hockey develop in the world. So please, if the lockout continues, send us a bunch of really good players,

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      • Daniel Wagner
        November 8, 2012

        I would love to see hockey get big all across the world and I love watching lower-level hockey here in Canada, so I’m sure I would love watching it in the Netherlands. But it is a little humorous that a borderline fourth-liner in the NHL is being treated like, well, Elvis in the Netherlands. You have to admit, that is a little bit funny.

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        Rating: +6 (from 6 votes)
  9. Tengeresz
    November 8, 2012

    Maybe I’m over-thinking this, but I just assumed the snarky tone of these articles are a bit of dark humour lamenting the lack of NHL news. I am sad to see that this is turning into bad feelings when I suspect that Dale Weise himself is enjoying the attention and ribbing (an important part of hockey culture, along with mild-hotdogs).

    FWIW, I am enjoying watching teenagers in the WHL playing live hockey a lot, and I’m sure that the Dutch league we’re talking about is good entertaining hockey. Heck, I’ll go and cheer at an 8 year old’s soccer game because people are having fun.

    That does not mean I miss the superlative skill, speed, and toughness of NHL hockey. It does mean that I hope my friends (and family-in-laws) in the Netherlands read this and see it for what I think it is supposed to be: witty sardonic fun.

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    Rating: +9 (from 9 votes)
  10. Ulf Oststromm
    November 8, 2012

    Another dutchie here. Loving the articles about Dale Weise, ROFLMAO on the Dragon Satbbing League comment, my coffee is now in my keyboard and on my monitor :-)
    Keep ‘em coming, there are plenty of us who in fact can take a roast about the mediocrity of our league and laugh about the apparent distinction between bananas and fruit. :-D

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  11. Ginja Ninja
    November 9, 2012

    I would have never thought that Dale Weise in 2012-13 was going to reincarnate as Jarome Iginla circa 2001-02. I mean with the hits, fights, goals, points, he’s unstoppable! I am sure he’ll transfer those hands of stone (and silk) back to the NHL right?

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  12. BornSlaming
    November 9, 2012

    Dutch fans, please just watch some clips of what we consider ‘top tier’ football (soccer) and then aptly apply any comments from this blog in reverse and I swear you will see the humor =).

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    • BornSlaming
      November 9, 2012

      Canada is so bad at football we lost to Hondouras 8-1 … imagnie what our club teams look like

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  13. ProudtoDutch
    November 9, 2012

    Hockey is canada, hockey is not Holland. Holland is football, fieldhockey, fastskating, swimming. For a little country we have we are great in sports. Too bad we never thought about teaching our fieldhockeyplayers how to skate. Too bad for us die hard hockeyfans. We watch our live hockeygames on a low level, and we stay up in the middle of the night to watch NHL games. We are all fan of the most beautiful sport of the planet.
    At least we are able to go to the stadium and the leaugue is not owned by people with only dollars in their eyes…..

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