You can’t lock out Chris Higgins’ abs

The charity game between Bieksa’s Buddies and the UBC Thunderbirds was a massive hit, raising $100,000 for the Canucks for Kids Fund, Canucks Autism Network, and the Canucks Family Education Centre that was matched by a generous donation from Michael Bublé. It also gave an outlet for Canucks fans desperate to watch their favourite players actually playing hockey.

The game featured many of the elements you would see in a normal Canucks game: wizardous Sedinerie, a terrible second period, and a photograph of Chris Higgins’ remarkable abs. Well, actually, four photos of Chris Higgins’ abs.

So, here they are, I guess. If you’re into that sort of thing.

   

Higgins’ tendency to not wear shirts has been well-documented by PITB in the past, starting with the original post on the subject that was really just a trick to get people to read about advanced statistics like Corsi, PDO, and zone starts. These photos come courtesy of 17-year-old Judith on Tumblr, whose obsession with a male celebrity’s abs is a little more defensible than ours.

The reason this time for the revealing of Higgins’ well-sculpted lower torso? The players on Bieksa’s Buddies gave the jerseys off their backs to several lucky fans at the Doug Mitchell Thunderbird Sports Centre. I missed the whole thing while standing in a media scrum waiting for Michael Bublé to appear (A wild Bublé appears!). We heard the cheers and applause emanating from the rink, punctuated by two massive roars that made us wonder what we were missing.

I should have known: the first massive roar was for Higgins’ removing his shirt in front of 5000 slavering Canucks fans. The second, and larger, roar was for Willie Mitchell, who was repeatedly announced as “Stanley Cup winner, Willie Mitchell.” Vancouverites love a local boy winning the Cup. Going by the applause-o-meter, the official voting system of Clone High,  that means having incredible abs is almost as good as winning the Stanley Cup.

I have to admit, I was little bummed out that I missed the excitement. I should have known that Tumblr wouldn’t let me down.

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7 comments

  1. Karen
    October 19, 2012

    THANK YOU for posting this! We left the game right after the shoot-out, foolishly thinking “oh, the players are just giving away their jerseys, so we better beat the crowd back to the parkade” and THEN realized that Higgins was one of the players… epic fail.

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  2. SteveB
    October 19, 2012

    uNF!
    I’ll be in my bunk.

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    • er... Jess
      October 20, 2012

      HA! Go Firefly.

      But seriously, isn’t showing just these photos like racist or something against the other players? Many men gave away jerseys – aren’t there any other abs shots?

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      • Daniel Wagner
        October 20, 2012

        Most other players wear undershirts beneath their shoulder pads, so no. If there were, they would be shared, believe me.

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  3. Martie
    October 19, 2012

    I’m a great admirer of Chris Higgins’ abs and think that his 6 pack definitely stands comparison with “The man with the perfect body” Eugen Sandow’s 8 pack.

    The article on the BBC was published today.

    http://www.bbc.com/news/magazine-19977415

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    • Kenji
      October 23, 2012

      They are immense. I work out but I have like, a 1/4 pack. Each Higgins ab is the size of an apple! It is impressive but almost unsettling, like something is going to jump out of his skin a la John Hurt.

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  4. Winsy
    October 20, 2012

    Thank you Judith for taking the pictures and thank you Pass it to Bulis for bringing them to us! Much appreciated!

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