Patron saint Jan Bulis nearly chops a guy’s head off with his skate (VIDEO)

In addition to being the patron saint of this blog, Jan Bulis is also an active hockey player. The former Vancouver Canuck plies his trade with Traktor Chelyabink of the KHL, which means that, occasionally, word of his exploits will reach us across the continent.

Here is one such exploit, and in typical Bulisian fashion, it’s a bit of a clustercuss.

In a game between Traktor and Yekaterinburg Automobilist, Bulis got tangled up with Yekaterinburg defenceman Denis Solokov. Then, in a move one might suggest, in retrospect, was ill-advised, Bulis attempted to hop over the fallen blueliner.

He had no momentum and one of his skates was tied up, so it should come as no surprise that he didn’t make it all the way over. Instead, he came down on Solokov’s neck, slicing open the 35-year-old’s carotid artery. The incident occurs at the 1:14 mark of this video and be warned that there is a lot of blood, so maybe consider this NSFW (unless you work in a hospital).

While you’re recoiling in horror, be assured that Solokov is okay. From Puck Daddy:

Sokolov said he expects to miss his team’s next game against Dynamo Moscow on Friday but will be back for the Sept. 20 match against Khanty-Mansiysk. Because that’s what hockey players do.

Again, your word of the day, kids: “lucky.”

Bulis is lucky too, and this isn’t the first time he’s gotten lucky on an ill-conceived leaping incident. Canuck fans will recall the time he hopped onto the back of Niklas Hagman of the Dallas Stars in the late stages of a game, receiving a brief piggyback ride before Hagman went down.

Stunned by the absurd cluenessness of the incident, none of the officials could even blow their whistles. Fortunately for them, they got a do-over when Bulis ran over Marty Turco later in the same shift.

Tommy Larscheid once said, “Let’s face facts. Jan Bulis is just a dumb hockey player.” It may have been a little harsh, but I think it’s clear from both videos featured here today that he occasionally suffers lapses in judgment. The “it” in “Pass it to Bulis” could reasonably refer to common sense.

Speaking of lapses in judgment, Canucks Army recently dug up and translated a Bulis interview in which he admitted that his world-changing year in Vancouver would never have happened if his agent did his job and told Bulis about the other, longer, better, richer contract offers available to him:

I had a good season in Montreal. I played 70 games, scored 20 goals and had 20 assists. I was 27, it was the pinnacle of my career. Even though my contract was going to expire, I knew I’d get some other offers. I was right. When the market opened on the 1st of July, I received 15 offers. Nevertheless, my agent at that time – he’s not my agent anymore – decided to wait for whatever reason. 2 weeks went by. Then a whole month. Yet I still had no contract.

In the end, I had to sign a 1-year deal with the Canucks, which wasn’t as good as the others. I learned afterwards that some other teams were interested in signing me for 3-4 years. Although, my former agent never told me about it. I don’t know why.

We should send that agent a thank-you card. Heck, we would if we weren’t so sure he’d just lose it.

s/t to Puck Daddy.

3 comments

  1. peanutflower
    September 12, 2012

    As far as I’m concerned Jan Bulis can only be remembered for two — well, three things in our house: His hilarious “welcome to the NHL” butt check on Jack Johnson, the fact that my youngest daughter was convinced that “Jan Bulis” was really “Young Bulis” (and he shall remain forever so in our house), and having generated the wonderful PITB. In my mind that’s enough for Bulis to gain immortality :)

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  2. Bluetouque
    September 12, 2012

    That piggy back clip is worth it just to hear the “Ah man…” at the end from Larscheid.

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  3. By-Tor
    September 12, 2012

    So… does this mean PitB will deal with it’s enemies by beheading them?

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