Roberto Luongo talks to everyone; hear infamous CFox chat, watch awkward Poker News interview

Now that Ryan Suter and Zach Parise are off the market, the attention has turned to some of the NHL’s other players who might be on the move this offseason — chief amongst them, Roberto Luongo. The Canucks netminder, who has been quiet (-ish) all spring amid rumours that he’s on the way out, headed to the World Poker championships in Las Vegas this weekend (with the tab picked up by the B.C. Lottery Coporation in a minor controversy).

Suddenly, freed from his hideout in Florida, Luongo has became super available and talkative. As a result, that vacuum of controversy, speculation and offseason rosterbation created by the Parise and Suter signings has been since filled by our old pal Funny Bob.

Most of the interest stems from his first (but technically second) interview since the end of last season, a chat with Jeff O’Neill of CFox radio during which Luongo indicated that his time in Vancouver has come to an end.

“I think we all know what’s going on,” he said. “We’ve all seen what’s developed. At the end of the day, I think it’s time to move on. And I’m OK with that. I had a great six years in Vancouver. It’s a really wonderful city. I really enjoyed my time there. Unfortunately, I was not able to bring a Stanley Cup there. Probably my biggest regret. But it’ll be remembered for six great years.”

The entire interview is below. The comments come at about the 10:00 mark.

Credit to O’Neill for getting a scoop here. Prior to this, his most noteworthy interactions with the Canucks were his banter-heavy chats with Kevin Bieksa and that time he allegedly earned a hangup from Mike Gillis for asking if the Canucks’ GM was circumcised.

(Note to aspiring hockey journalists: Do not ask NHL general managers about their penises.)

Anyway, apart from the semi-bombshell that Luongo feels it’s time to move on — which isn’t so much a bombshell as much as its confirmation of what everybody already knew, Luongo also gave a handful of less ground-breaking, and yet very hilarious answers. Here are our favourites:

  • On whether or not he’s @strombone1: “That’s a great question. I’ve heard a lot about this @strombone1 in the last little while. I think he’s really funny, so, uh… I don’t particularly tweet that much.”
  • On if he could deal with hearing ‘Chelsea Dagger’ a lot if he were traded to Chicago: “”I like that song. It’s catchy. I heard it seven times in one game.”
  • On whether or not he pees in the shower: “”That is a great question. I’ve had that issue with a lot of the boys in the locker room this year, and I’m not a big fan of peeing in the shower.” In other words, no he doesn’t, but someone on the Canucks does and it’s gross.

As well, Luongo is posed the circumcision question, so the interview also features insider information on the state of his junk, if you’re into that. Anyway.

Also amusing, although perhaps not at pot-stirring, is this much shorter interview Luongo did with Sarah Grant of Poker News.

The best part is that the poor young lady has no idea who he is. “I am with Roberto Luongo, very important and famous NHL… *awkward long pause* … goalie.”

Thankfully, that’s not the most awkward moment of the interview. That comes shortly after, when a big dude walks right in front of the camera and stumbles over the cord. Quality!

I quite like Luongo’s description of the butterfly style. “Pretty much, drop to your knees, close your eyes and hope that the puck hits you.”

Finally, we have one last chat to report. Since Roberto Luongo’s in Las Vegas and he’s talking to everybody, do you think the important dinner to which president and CEO of the Florida Panthers Michael Yormark is referring might involve a certain Italian netminder?

 

Granted, I’d put more stock in this if A) Yormark were Dale Tallon, B) Speaking to Luongo wasn’t tampering since he’s under contract to another team, and C) Luongo were a free agent and not a guy that needs to be acquired via trade. Shouldn’t Yormark be talking to Mike Gillis, not Luongo?

Mind you, maybe Yormark made the same mistake as Jeff O’Neill and now Gillis won’t answer his calls. Note to aspiring NHL GMs…

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21 comments

  1. Brent
    July 8, 2012

    Another awesome PITB! Thanks for keeping it going in the summer!

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    Rating: +8 (from 8 votes)
  2. Mack
    July 8, 2012

    “Granted, I’d put more stock in this if A) Yormark were Dale Tallon, B) Speaking to Luongo wasn’t tampering since he’s under contract to another team, and C) Luongo were a free agent and not a guy that needs to be acquired via trade. Shouldn’t Yormark be talking to Mike Gillis, not Luongo?”

    Tallon could be heading along. So could Gillis for all we know. It’s also not tampering if the Canucks give them permission to talk to him. If I were thinking of committing that much money for however many years I’d sure as hell want to talk to him and determine that he wants to be a part of the organization.

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    Rating: +4 (from 6 votes)
    • Harrison Mooney
      July 8, 2012

      Definitely possibilities. Maybe Yormark’s just tagging along because it’s Vegas, baby?

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      Rating: +3 (from 3 votes)
      • Brent
        July 8, 2012

        Maybe a lot of the deal has already been done, and this is a conformation meeting/dinner. Certainly Florida would be good for Roberto’s family situation. Does this mean SAMJAM was right?

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        Rating: +1 (from 3 votes)
        • Cody
          July 8, 2012

          So many maybes to cover, so little time.

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          Rating: +3 (from 3 votes)
        • Harrison Mooney
          July 8, 2012

          No way. SamJam’s throwing crap at the wall now. Even if he nails the deal an hour before everyone else, he doesn’t get credit for it because he’s been wrong, like, seven times leading up to it.

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          Rating: +7 (from 7 votes)
          • Brent
            July 8, 2012

            Kind of like people who predict earthquakes, eventually they get one right.

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            Rating: +4 (from 4 votes)
  3. Zach Morris
    July 8, 2012

    sigh.
    I guess we’re pretty sure he’s going to be traded, eh?

    At least the man knows how to finish strong, he’s proven to be a pretty awesome guy these last few months.

    Where was this cool, suave, humourous goaltender hiding these past six years?

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    Rating: +14 (from 14 votes)
    • laplander
      July 8, 2012

      The funny this is that I agree – if Luongo had acted like this for the last 3 years he would have a great following sceaming “D@m8, why do we have to lose Lou?”.
      I believe Schneider looks like a technically better goalie and we would have to trade Lou but…

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      Rating: +4 (from 4 votes)
    • Harrison Mooney
      July 8, 2012

      He’s always been here. He lost it a bit during the captaincy, but even then he was still pretty funny. Vancouver fans have just been blinded by shortsightedness, humourlessness, and high expectations. It’s a shame.

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      Rating: +34 (from 34 votes)
      • Abby
        July 8, 2012

        It is a shame. Much as I’m excited for the Schneider era to start, I’m going to miss Lu a heck of a lot.

        Darn it. Why can’t we just have them both- and positive fan input?

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        Rating: +12 (from 12 votes)
  4. Fruzenius
    July 8, 2012

    Oh man, that comment about hearing Chelsea Dagger absolutely killed me. That was amazing

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    Rating: +13 (from 13 votes)
    • Abby
      July 8, 2012

      I love the sense of humor he’s got. Quality player, high class.

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      Rating: +9 (from 9 votes)
  5. Nee
    July 8, 2012

    God I love this guy. I’ll miss him alot.

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    Rating: +9 (from 9 votes)
  6. cathylu
    July 9, 2012

    One of the reasons we became Canucks fans was all the “LUUUUUUU”-ing from the crowd at the first game we went to (and the “WOOOOOOO” after we scored a goal). I will definitely miss him if he goes.

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    Rating: +4 (from 6 votes)
    • charizard
      July 14, 2012

      The “woo” is incredibly annoying…

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      • Daniel Wagner
        July 15, 2012

        I believe you misspelled “awesome.”

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  7. akidd
    July 9, 2012

    “rosterbation”?!? if that’s an original, harrison, you’d better get yourself down to the patent office…quick.

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    • Chuggo Fizzins
      July 9, 2012

      My first encounter with Rosterbation is Season 2, Episode 1 of “The League” on FX.

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  8. paul
    July 9, 2012

    YOU MUST GIVE THE MAN CREDIT. HE TRIED. REALLY HIS DEMISE, IS THE STYLE HE PLAYS. TOO MUCH ON THIS STOMACH-THUS THE NICK NAME ” FLOPPY” I DO WISH HIM WELL, PERHAPS HE WILL DO THREE THNGS, THE REST OF HIS CAREER.
    1. PLAY A STAND UP GOALIE, LIKE THE PROS OF THE PAST DID IN THE 40′S , 50, AND 60′S,.
    2. COME BACK AND HAUNT THE CANUCKS, AND WIN A STANLEY CUP OR TWO ELSE WHERE,
    3. ENJOY THE BIG SALARY HE HAS BEEN GETTING, SALT SOME OF IT AWAY, AND BECOME A GREAT BUSINESSMAN, AND CONINUE TO LOVE PEOPLE AND KIDS. BYE ,BYE ROBERTO ( MR FLOPPY )

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    Rating: -2 (from 8 votes)
  9. Tamara B
    July 11, 2012

    The tears are from laughing… sniff, sniff…. yup, laughing.

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