Check out the Vancouver Wellwoods’ new jerseys; Don’t forget to ask them about Ken Johnson

Back in late January, we took up the cause of finding a sponsor for the Vancouver Wellwoods, PITB’s official women’s road hockey team. For years, the Wellwoods had been playing in baby blue t-shirts with iron-on decals, but they had decided it was time for them to graduate to snazzier duds. They needed jerseys, and since jerseys cost money, they needed a sponsor willing to pony up the scratch.

Thanks entirely to our ability to needlessly inject ourselves into the discussion for personal gain crowdsource, the Wellwoods were able to find not one, but two sponsors: BC Diabetes,  an organization “dedicated to providing excellence in diabetes care, research and education to all British Columbians,” and Ken Johnson, a kind young man with no business to speak of, save the business of finding his soulmate.

In exchange for our help, the Wellwoods promised that they would dedicate the left shoulder patch to this blog. That’s the awesomeness you see above.

But frankly, I’m way more amused by the contents of the right shoulder.

In exchange for subsidizing the jersey costs, both BC Diabetes and Ken Johnson were given a patch on the left shoulder. Since BC Diabetes has a logo, the Wellwoods went with that.

But Ken Johnson has no such logo. Rather, he simply requested the patch read “Ask me about Ken Johnson”, and, when the ladies were asked, that he be recommended as a suitable life partner.

It’s the best plan ever. If he finds love this way, he deserves a gold medal.

The phrase “Ask me about Ken Johnson” now becomes to PITB as “Who is John Galt?” is to Atlas Shrugged.

Thanks to BC Diabetes, Ken Johnson, for their help, and thanks to the Wellwoods for being the coolest official women’s road hockey team we’ve ever had.

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23 comments

  1. Kit
    May 28, 2012

    If I wasn’t already spoken for I’d be asking about Ken Johnson, because he obviously has moxie.

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    • SK
      May 28, 2012

      Ditto

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    • Rituro
      May 28, 2012

      But can he take down splicers in Rapture?

      (Yes, “Bioshock” is the entirety of my “Atlas Shrugged” knowledge. I regret nothing.)

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      Rating: +15 (from 15 votes)
    • D to the W
      May 28, 2012

      He also has some amount of money.

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      • TheWellwoods
        May 29, 2012

        and two kitties!

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    • SteveB
      May 28, 2012

      Not only does he have moxie, but I’ve also heard that Ken Johnson is clutch.

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      Rating: +10 (from 10 votes)
  2. MelT
    May 28, 2012

    I’m surprised the Wellwoods haven’t found him anyone yet, a nice guy who likes hockey, what else do you need? Maybe you guys could write this story in soap opera style, like the continuing romantic adventures of Ken Johnson!
    Oh wait, you’re still working on a zombie series…or are you?

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    Rating: +13 (from 13 votes)
    • SteveB
      May 28, 2012

      pssst, Salo is your Pal-o…

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    • TheWellwoods
      May 29, 2012

      We have very discriminating taste – we’ll only set Ken up with the very best!

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      Rating: +6 (from 6 votes)
  3. Tengeresz
    May 28, 2012

    Good news about good causes helping good gals play hockey.
    It’s all good.

    And periodically, please do tell us about Ken Johnson.

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    Rating: +13 (from 13 votes)
  4. Mauschen
    May 28, 2012

    So what’s Ken Johnson looking for in a suitable life partner? ;)

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    Rating: +5 (from 5 votes)
    • TheWellwoods
      May 29, 2012

      We’ll be meeting with him soon to find out!

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      Rating: +7 (from 7 votes)
      • Ken J
        May 29, 2012

        I guess I better make a wish list!

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        Rating: +3 (from 3 votes)
        • MelT
          May 29, 2012

          She has to like hockey, right? And no Boston fans.

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          Rating: +2 (from 2 votes)
  5. Ken J
    May 29, 2012

    I’d like to keep a blog about my adventures trying to find love, but what cards would I be holding at the end of the date if she could log on and read my thoughts on the whole experience? ;)

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    • MelT
      May 29, 2012

      Just a tip, it’s probably not good to blog during the date.

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      Rating: +3 (from 3 votes)
  6. cathylu
    May 29, 2012

    This is the feel-good story of the off-season! Please keep us posted on Ken Johnson.

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    Rating: +4 (from 4 votes)
  7. Canucksgold
    May 29, 2012

    All the best to Ken Johnson. Like the Atlas Shrugged reference. I think this isn’t the first time Ayn Rand has been used in a literary device in PITB?

    I think it’s the only sports blog that would do so.

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  8. Tamara B
    May 29, 2012

    Well, Best wishes to The Wellwoods AND Ken Johnson! I hope they both have very happy and successful seasons ;)

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  9. SteveB
    May 29, 2012

    It would be some kind of awesome if Wellwoods jerseys were available for sale to their adoring fans.

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  10. sarah
    May 30, 2012

    I think Ken should totally write a blog about this! I’m not enjoying this season of the Bachelorette that much.

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  11. JDM
    May 30, 2012

    PITB should probably do an in-depth tell-all interview with Ken Johnson, esq.

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  12. Marcus
    May 31, 2012

    Ken Johnson should be getting the girl modeling the jersey to ask her self about Ken Johnson… OK that didn’t make a lot of sense- but still sexy hockey player. Rawr.

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