Milan Lucic and his girlfriend claim Grouse Mountain for the city of Boston.
We’ve seen some bizarre battle combinations in the ongoing rivalry between the Vancouver Canucks and the Boston Bruins. Brad Marchand versus Sami Salo. PITB versus Touch & Wilbur. Shawn Thornton versus 88 guys, Kill Bill-style, followed by a round with end boss Tony Gallagher. But now, it would appear, that we have another unlikely dispute: Cory Schneider’s girlfriend versus Milan Lucic’s girlfriend.
According to Lucic’s girlfriend, Brittany, Schneider’s girlfriend told her off at a recent game just for wearing her Bruins hat. This tell-off even included the taunt of English archers. How do we know? Because Brittany took to her Twitter account to voice her disapproval.
I personally take offense to the directive to “control your broad”. My wife can do whatever she wants. Like, I wouldn’t particularly want her flipping off other women, nor would I want her making man-children everywhere titter by publicly airing petty grievances like this. But if that’s what she wants to do, that’s her prerogative as a free woman I don’t control.
Now I guess I’m supposed to rub my hands together gleefully and shout “girlfight!” or make some sort of hair-pulling joke or whatever, but I really don’t have time for sexist drivel. There are battle lines to draw here, and it’s going to take awhile. This is the most confusing turf war ever, and I once mediated a groundskeepers’ dispute over which variety of Kentucky Bluegrass to install on a soccer pitch.
Schneider and his girlfriend, Jill, are both from Boston. But they rep Vancouver, because Schneider plays for Vancouver. Lucic and his girlfriend, Brittany, are both from Vancouver. But they wear Boston hats, because Lucic plays for Boston. Everyone’s a double agent. It’s like a Mission: Impossible movie, but with less running.
Take, for instance, the implication in Brittany’s first tweet that Schneider’s girlfriend’s alleged classlessness is a symptom of her Boston upbringing. Isn’t Brittany, now repping Boston, supposed to take offense to that?
And frankly, Brittany’s assertion that Jill was the only Canuck fan to take issue with her hat smacks of Vancouver bias. You expect us to believe that only one Vancouver fan was acting rudely? Yeah right. And as a Boston fan, you’re supposed to characterize all Vancouver fans as rioters. Were I from Boston, I would not stand for one of my own attempting to paint the majority of Canuck nation as “VERY kind”.
But there is one thing I know for sure: Trucking is a universal profession. You don’t have to be from Boston or Vancouver to know that it’s not cool to disrespect the heroes of the road by dragging their good name into this. TRUCKERS ARE PEOPLE TOO.
Anyway. I don’t care about this at all, so I’m going to make like ICBC and lazily declare this dispute a 50/50. But I will say this: thank goodness the Canucks employ Cory Schneider and not this Corey Snyder fellow, because he and his lady friend appear to exhibit none of the character and integrity Mike Gillis champions of his roster.
s/t to Legion of Blog, and also everyone else who sent this to us.Tags: classlessness, cory schneider girlfriend, fight fight fight, milan lucic girlfriend, schneider, shamelessly using tags for search-engine optimization, truckers are people too, Twitter, wives and girlfriends