Spitballin’ on gas station sandwiches, Chicago Wolves specialty jerseys, and that dancing kid

Spitballin’ (or Super Pass ITBulis: All In, if you love adventurous acronymizing) is a feature that allows us to touch on a multitude of things really fast, because in the world of hockey, there are always lots of things to find and colour. Here are a few quick topics.

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Daniel and Henrik Sedin, playoff performers

The panic over Daniel and Henrik Sedin’s dropoff in scoring bewilders me, especially in that it completely contradicts the annual dismissal of their regular-season totals. We hear the same thing every year: Their scoring doesn’t mean anything until they can get it done in the playoffs.

If that’s the case, it really shouldn’t matter how they’re doing right now, since it’s not the playoffs and their regular-season production is in no way indicative of what they’ll do then. Right?

Of course, that’s not how it works, and many are using the Sedins’ recent slump as evidence that they won’t be able to produce in the postseason. So basically, the way I understand it, anything from the regular-season that projects positively doesn’t count, and anything that projects negatively is magnified by a billion.

David Booth will eat anything, apparently

Last week, David Booth’s Twitter account got some major play in this space, and we have to give him some love again for this tweet:

It’s funny on its own, just because it’s so succinct and horrifying, but what makes it even funnier is that it came two hours after this Ryan Kesler tweet.

Now, I’m not sure if Kesler was, shall we say, “encouraged” to tweet this, or if he spontaneously felt the need to share with us the wonders of his $16 luxury hotel restaurant sandwich, but either way, it definitely reads like a commercial. I love the way Booth managed to deconstruct it in six words.

Chicago Wolves St. Patrick’s Day jerseys

Here are Mike Duco and Eddie Lack modelling the special, Chicago Wolves St. Patrick’s Day Jerseys, which will be worn on Wednesday, March 14, Saturday, March 24, and Sunday, March 25, then auctioned off as part of the team’s St. Patrick’s Day fundraiser in benefit of Easter Seals. There’s no arguing with the cause; how’s the jersey itself?

They’re no Chicago Express pint o’beer jerseys but, as a fan of the Minnesota Wild Christmas tree jersey, I like the primary colour a lot. Frankly, I think forest green is woefully under-utilized in hockey, a winter sport that should have a whole lot more pine representation. But the more I look at these, the more I think it doesn’t work. First, the tan lettering and trim only serves to wash the green right out, and it doesn’t pop the way diagonal wording needs to. White would have looked much better, and it would have served to mute the Jewel-Osco patch on the shoulder, which stands out like a sore thumb now.

And I’m not feeling the plaid stripe along the bottom. Again, I think it’s the colouring.

That said, I might like these better if they weren’t taken in front of a carpenter beige wall. Seriously. No one looks good standing in front of carpenter beige. That’s the default wall colour in new houses so that you have to buy paint.

Dancing Jack is the new ‘I Didn’t Do it’ Boy

Considering this video of young Jack Milos busting a move to LMFAO’s “I’m Sexy and I Know it” has over 700,000 views, I’m assuming you’ve seen it already, but let me be the first to say I don’t really get it.

Yeah, it’s super cute, but cute kids dance on the Jumbotron every week, and they’d all keep dancing if you held a camera on them for an entire song. While Jack is better than most, is he really “flown to The Today Show” better? This doesn’t make any sense to me.

What creeps me out about when these dancing kids go viral (and it happens all the time, seriously) is that they get brought to television shows to re-enact spontaneity, and wind up looking like prisoners of their own precociousness. Dance for us! Do it now!

For example, here’s Jack on Urban Rush, where his slick moves seem less like a thing done in the heat of the moment and more like a thing done because grown-ups told him he was supposed to.

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14 comments

  1. V
    March 16, 2012

    The way the “Wolves” name crosses diagonally makes it look like a sash to me. I keep imagining it as “Miss America”, which is disconcerting to say the least.

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  2. Cathylu
    March 16, 2012

    I think the Wolves jersey is okay but the Jewel-Osco advertising patch is horrible. What the heck.

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    Rating: +9 (from 9 votes)
  3. bergberg
    March 16, 2012

    Who hasn’t eaten a gas station sandwich.

    Nice to see hockey players are just people who make poor ingestion decisions too.

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    Rating: +22 (from 22 votes)
  4. TheOldFirm
    March 16, 2012

    I’m still entirely convinced that David Booth is trying to catch a case of [url=http://members.arstechnica.com/users/iko/files/futurama_worms.jpg]These Guys.[/url]

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  5. Chris B
    March 16, 2012

    Yeah, I’m not sure who would have thought that brown would have gone with pine green. Damn Nature!

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  6. J21
    March 16, 2012

    “If that’s the case, it really shouldn’t matter how they’re doing right now, since it’s not the playoffs and their regular-season production is in no way indicative of what they’ll do then. Right?

    Of course, that’s not how it works, and many are using the Sedins’ recent slump as evidence that they won’t be able to produce in the postseason. So basically, the way I understand it, anything from the regular-season that projects positively doesn’t count, and anything that projects negatively is magnified by a billion.”

    I think this is a little less esoteric than you’re making it sound. It’s not that people believe that regular season and playoff scoring have some complete disconnect, such that one is completely unassociated with the other. It’s that they (rightly) believe that for most players not named John Druce, scoring goes down in the playoffs. So a player putting up big regular season numbers will often tend to elicit the “let’s see what he can do in the playoffs” comment, because that kind of performance is much harder to sustain. Conversely, players not scoring the regular season are kind of assumed to be write-offs to score in the playoffs, all-around. So when a regular season offensive star doesn’t score, there absolutely is reason to be a little worried.

    Forest green: yes. Green of all sorts is underutilized in the NHL. I loved the North Stars’ uniforms.

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    • Harrison Mooney
      March 16, 2012

      yeah, I don’t disagree. It just makes me chuckle when I see people dismiss regular-season accomplishments so summarily and absolutely. Either it does matter or it doesn’t.

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      Rating: +8 (from 8 votes)
  7. Mike H.
    March 16, 2012

    I couldn’t watch the last video. I imagine it’s like when the Double Rainbow guy did that commercial for Kodak or whatever. So sad…

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  8. Gladys
    March 16, 2012

    I think the reason for the attention dancing Jack got initially was the fact that he was dancing at such a terrible game. I was there and everyone was desperate for something to look at other than the rotten game and for some form of entertainment to justify even a fraction of the ticket price.

    As for the Wolves jersey, I think their mistake was in trying to make it look kind of classy. They probably should have gone for garish and ridiculous. It likely would have been more successful.

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  9. Tib
    March 16, 2012

    “For example, here’s Jack on Urban Rush, where his slick moves seem less like a thing done in the heat of the moment and more like a thing done because grown-ups told him he was supposed to.”

    Doesn’t every segment on Urban Rush have this exact same feel?

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  10. beano
    March 16, 2012

    “So basically, the way I understand it, anything from the regular-season that projects positively doesn’t count, and anything that projects negatively is magnified by a billion”

    except for players like Ryan Kessler who people seem to assume will turn on “beast mode” come playoffs. for these special few, whats positive in the regular season is only a glimpse of what is to come and what is negative is only happening because it is impossible to keep up “beast mode” for 82 games, but it is lurking there so its okay.

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    • Chris T.
      March 18, 2012

      Who’s Kessler?

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  11. Nee
    March 16, 2012

    It is strange that this particular cute kid video has gotten so much play. Maybe because of the song? Good for him though…got a free trip to New York!

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  12. akidd
    March 16, 2012

    poor booth. as a fitness guy that sandwich must’ve really hurt. and then kesler goes out and buys the most expensive sandwich he could find to rub it in, probably bolted out the door as soon as he read booth’s tweet.

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