I’m not entirely sure what to make of this picture of Chris Higgins. At first glance, it’s just a normal shot of a guy, maybe at the end of the shift, maybe just waiting for puck to drop. But on a closer examination, it becomes difficult to determine just what emotion he’s wearing on his face. It could be anything. Hunger? Thirst? Ennui? Disappointment? Jealousy? Zombiism? One simply cannot know.
But I must. And thus, I decided to splice Higgins into a handful of images, just to see if, perhaps, I could find one well-suited to his emotional vacancy. What follows are my best guesses.
I give you: disappointment. Poor Higgins just wanted to rent Alvin & The Chipmunks: The Squeakquel so that he’d be fully up to date on the mythology before he went to see Alvin & The Chipmunks: Chipwrecked. But then he discovered his favourite movie rental placed was closing forever.
I give you: irritation. Poor Higgins was just trying to wipe his nose with his shirt, but Jeff Vinnick snapped a picture and the next thing the Canucks’ winger knew his abs were all the rage. Then to make matters worse, someone put it in a gold leaf frame and called it art. Now he can’t even go to the museum without seeing his washboard stomach.
I give you: zombiism. He’s got the fake wound and the blank stare on lockdown. I’m also gonna go ahead and suggest this is where Higgins picked up that mystery infection.
I give you: jealousy. All Kiss Huggins wants is to be a part of the snuggles. Heck, he even hopped the boards just to join in. But then he had second thoughts. What if they don’t accept him? What if they tell him to go back to the bench where he belongs? So instead, he just stood nearby, waiting to be invited.Tags: Chris Higgins, I Find this Photo Odd, Kiss Huggins, zombiism