I Find This Photo Odd: Cory Schneider will kill you

We spoke earlier today about the Snack Goal principle, our explanation for that curiously frequent occurrence where the Canucks lose their shutout bid within the final ten minutes of games, and we made sure to point out that it wasn’t a Luongo-only phenomenon: Cory Schneider’s in on it too. Of course, that’s the only time during any game when Cory Schneider’s even remotely forgiving of shots in his direction. Try to score on him any other time, and he will kill you.

Case in point, this photo of Schneider running down Detroit Red Wings forward Darren Helm. That’s some Charles Bronson-style vigilantism right there. Silly Schneider, the Canucks don’t kill people, they strike back on the powerplay. Didn’t you know that?

Yeah. I find this photo odd.

Now normally, here’s where I do a photoshop to underscore my observations, say, by putting, like, a baseball bat or a Chinese broadsword in Schneider’s hands. But, @moto_mayhem is way ahead of me, and he’s been kind enough to do my work for me.

Granted, he may have a slightly darker vision than I do. This is gruesome.

I dunno, man, taking a chainsaw to a guy seems against the rules, but that’s just me, and I don’t much care for fighting either.

As usual, additional (and perhaps less violent) photoshops are encouraged.

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  1. Canuckles
    November 2, 2011

    This would have been even better on Halloween

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  2. The Bookie
    November 2, 2011

    I think you’re reading into it a bit much. All I see is Schneids being decent enough to give Fin a beerbong while making a spectacular save.
    Fin loves it when Schneids plays. Can’t trust Luongo with that, he’d drop the bottle and beer would go everywhere!

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    • Rituro
      November 3, 2011

      I wouldn’t have guessed orcas could tolerate beer…

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