These are great costumes. Too bad you didn't think this far ahead.

Today is October 31st, which means it’s time for the greatest costume-themed holiday of the year: Halloween! If you don’t have a costume yet, you might be in trouble. You don’t want to be one of those lame people who shows up at a party without a costume, or worse, a nametag with someone else’s name on it or a t-shirt that says “This is my costume.” But, because you’re either lazy or forgetful, you don’t have a lot of time to put a costume together.

Since you’re reading Pass it to Bulis, I’m going to assume a couple things about you: you are a refined person with great taste and you are a Canucks fan. You’re going to need to leave your taste behind temporarily – you don’t have time for it – but since you are a Canucks fan, we’ve created some ideas for last-minute Canucks-themed Halloween costumes.

  • Cut some headstones out of grey construction paper. Write the names of former Canuck netminders and tape them to a black shirt. You are now a Goalie Graveyard.
  • Grab blue jeans, hoodie, Canucks jersey, a pair of dress pants, and a backpack full of matchbox cars, lighter fluid, and a lighter. Wear the blue jeans, hoodie, Canucks jersey, and backpack. Carry the dress pants in your hand. From time to time take a matchbox car out of your backpack, flip it, and light it on fire. If people can’t figure out who you are, tell them that neither can the Vancouver Police Department.
  • Shave your head. Snag a pair of fairy wings from a female friend or Value Village. Smile disconcertingly. You are now a Moment of Pure Bulis.
  • Borrow a jaunty chapeau from a fashionable friend. Wrap your limbs with tensor bandages and carry an icepack. You are now Sami Salo. Add a cape made from a bath towel and cut a couple holes in a strip of fabric for a mask for extra PITB credit.
  • Strip naked. Lean against a block of ice. Naked Kesler costume complete.
  • Print out a picture of Ryan Kesler’s face, mount it on cardboard and attach it to your back so Kesler is peering over your shoulder. Instant Keslurk.
  • Want to be Mason Raymond? Go to a party and constantly circle around the perimeter of the room. If anyone stops you to make conversation, talk solely about how much you like cereal. If you happen to have a cowboy hat, perfect.
  • Find a doghouse. Write “AV” over the door. Go into it. You are now Keith Ballard.
  • Make an orange goatee out of construction paper. Get a punching puppet and put a tiny Boston Bruins jersey on it. Jab yourself in the head with it throughout the evening. You are now Daniel Sedin.
  • Make a black goatee out of construction paper. Spend the evening in the kitchen, helping. You are now Dan “Community Man” Hamhuis.
  • Shave your head. Hang out by the chips. Every time someone reaches for one, block their arm with your body and bat the chip behind you. You are now Manny Malhotra in the defensive zone.
  • Don’t sleep for weeks. Call the Team 1040 and let them try to guess what you want for ten minutes. Then call a friend and invite him to the party. Then, six minutes after he arrives, tell him he’s been traded to a party in Florida. You are now Mike Gillis.
  • Miss the party to go to the Roxy. You are now Shane O’Brien.
  • Dye your hair orange. You are now 75% of the Canucks’ roster.
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7 comments

  1. SteveB
    October 31, 2011

    Extra Halloween goodies for the PITB crew for that post!

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  2. Sarah
    October 31, 2011

    Dan “Community Man” Hamhuis in the Winnie-the-pooh costume is more cute than I can handle. Too bad, little girl who will show up at my house later in a fairy princess costume – you are only the second cutest…

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  3. LCad
    October 31, 2011

    I thought the one beginning with shaving your head and hanging out by the chips was going to be Mark Messier. Thank goodness.

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  4. CanuckFanInSF
    October 31, 2011

    “Find a doghouse. Write “AV” over the door. Go into it. You are now Keith Ballard.”

    I. DIE.

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  5. MelT
    October 31, 2011

    Great and hilarious ideas! Except for the naked Kesler costume which should be have a body fat percentage limit on it.

    I was in Seattle on Saturday night, and saw a guy walking down the sidewalk in full Henrik Sedin gear, blue pants, stick, helmet and everything but skates. Very unexpected and weird.

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  6. Nlee
    October 31, 2011

    This post is awesome.

    That is all.

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  7. SJ
    November 1, 2011

    Robin on How I Met Your Mother went as a Canuck for halloween. I thought that was awesome.

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