I Find This Photo Odd: Ryan Kesler is naked

Well, there you have it. It’s Ryan Kesler in the buff. Feast your eyes, you vultures (or gouge them out, whatever you’re into). Seems to me the “I Find This Photo Odd” tag was made for moments such as this. I’m gonna go ahead and add “Ryan Kesler has a mole on his left outer thigh” to the list of things that I wish I did not know.

Though ESPN’s “Body Issue” doesn’t hit newsstands until Friday, Undresler 2 has been making the rounds since Tuesday night, when @RunsOnDuncan tweeted a snapshot of the mag. Then, this morning, ESPN released a gallery of preview images to whet and/or spoil appetites, depending on which image you’re looking at and where your preferences lie. For instance, if you have a tire swing fetish, Helio Castroneves has you covered.

Kesler’s photo concerns me, and not because I’m uncomfortable with what I’m seeing (I am, but only appropriately so). Rather, it concerns me because, once Kesler gets into a habit of doing something in a photo, he tends to do it a lot. Sure, this picture appears to have been taken atop Mount Olympus, but are we sure Kesler’s not going to reprise the pose in more familiar locations? Is naked Keslurking on the horizon?

Is it so far-fetched? We theorized meta-Keslurking last March and it became a reality only six short months later, as Kesler keslurked his own interview, and then a photo of his family that he himself was in. As Kesler continues to innovate, can this be that far behind?

This is what practices could look like in the future, with Kesler suddenly appearing on the ice, sans gear, and striking a sudden pose in front of his teammates. In this one, Daniel Sedin finds it hilarious. Henrik Sedin, on the other hand, is not amused.

And game days could be a nightmare, although it might be useful in training Roberto Luongo to stay focused when there are unwanted bodies in front of him.

Note: we invite you fine folks to follow in our footsteps and photoshop Undresler 2 into many more odd locations. Follow us on Twitter (@passittobulis), both so you can tweet us your work and so you can see the works of others when we retweet them.

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51 comments

  1. MONA
    October 5, 2011

    Wow – he looks great…. but isn’t the whole “woo look at me, I’m nude” thing getting a little tiring? Who cares… lol….. just another expression of egotistical behavior.

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    • peanutflower
      October 5, 2011

      Well, Kesler can have as big an ego as he wishes as far as I’m concerned. If that’s what keeps him going and driven then I’ll accept egoism as part of the package. Not that I can see the package, but you get my drift. Did I just say that?

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      • Michdog
        October 5, 2011

        You said it all, baby!

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  2. Oscar Manuel
    October 5, 2011

    Very important news! Interesting how the biggest story in most papers in the U.S. is ignored in Canada…..The taking over of Wall Street by the people. Wake up young folks!

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    • Daniel Wagner
      October 5, 2011

      Are any of the people taking over Wall Street Canucks players? Are they playing street hockey on Wall Street? No? Then I’m not sure why you expected to find that story on a Canucks hockey blog.

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      • Harrison Mooney
        October 5, 2011

        Naked Wall Street street hockey, now there’s a money post.

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        Rating: +6 (from 6 votes)
        • Daniel Wagner
          October 5, 2011

          Yes. Make it happen, protesters.

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  3. Nat
    October 5, 2011

    Harrison, it sounds like you have some serious body issues. Get over it. The photo is fine. What you should be doing is asking yourself why you are uncomfortable with such an innocent photo.

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    • Harrison Mooney
      October 5, 2011

      Nat, I’m kidding. If I actually had a problem with this photo, I wouldn’t have taken the time to meticulously photoshop it into other images.

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      • Nat
        October 5, 2011

        Well that makes me feel better. However, your irony does not come across well in the piece. Sorry, but I would hope for a little more wit.

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        • George Stevens
          October 5, 2011

          Nat –
          The photo is not innocent (naked men never are), and the irony of the article is loud and clear. You might notice that the image of Kesler was photoshopped into several other images. Do you think that’s done in an attempt at serious, non-ironic dialogue into the human form?

          I’m still scraping my eyes out because of this photo. Take your high-horse and your faulty irony-detector somewhere it’s needed.

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          • TubaNat
            October 5, 2011

            Just defending my name here so you don’t think all Nats have no sense of humour:
            If I had a body like Kesler I’d probably be naked a lot more often too.

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  4. Craig
    October 5, 2011

    Living this down wont be easy! haha good one Kes

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  5. kessler triplets
    October 5, 2011

    Umm is it just me or are there sedin triplets in the 2nd photo? …

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    • Aimee
      October 5, 2011

      No, The third player is Alex Edler, although the facial hair may have confused you, he is not read-headed or a Sedin.

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      • JS Topher
        October 5, 2011

        he’s also not RED headed…

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  6. DollyDanger
    October 5, 2011

    OMFG I dont care about Ryan’s ego, I dont care if he has a wife, I dont care what anyone says about him, HE IS HOT AND I WANT HIM NOW!!!!

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  7. J.P.Newton
    October 5, 2011

    ‘Gonna’ is not a word. It’s comic-strip langauage that does not deserve to be on the pages of a significant newspaper.

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    • Daniel Wagner
      October 5, 2011

      Good thing it’s in the Sun, then.

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      • peanutflower
        October 5, 2011

        Too bad I can only like this snappy retort once…

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        • JS Topher
          October 5, 2011

          I dedicate my “like” on behalf of you

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  8. Appreciative
    October 5, 2011

    Wowee thank you for sharing your self with the woman of Vancouver, we really needed this. Canuks should make a Calendar for charity. I would hang it up:)

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  9. OnyxL
    October 5, 2011

    I barely know anything about Kesler other than he plays hockey for the Canucks but with this on the cover of the Sun (where maybe some news should be – like covering the Occupation of Wall Street – which the mainstream media doesn’t want to do for some obvious reason) I had to take a look at the article behind it.

    And I see these photos were taken for ESPN..are they supposed to be an expose of what goes on in the Canucks dressing room?

    Why does Kesler’s skin look blackish…is that supposed to be the burnished look? It looks grubby.

    The last photo is pretty funny….Luongo trying to avoid looking at Kesler. I mean what is he supposed to do…Kesler in the dressing room posed provocatively with his bare butt sticking out? Poor guy probably felt like turning around and going back to the ice!

    To Daniel Wagner – the reason people are mentioning the Occupation of Wall Street is this photo appeared on the cover of the Vancouver Sun which is also studiously ignoring the Occupation of Wall Street as well as upcoming protests in Vancouver and other parts of Canada. If that story had been covered a few of us probably wouldn’t have been bored enough to come and see what the story was behind this photo. Not really a story but more funny photos.

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    • Daniel Wagner
      October 5, 2011

      I am aware. Complaining on a Canucks hockey blog connected to the Sun, however, is counter-productive. We can’t really do anything about it and the people who can do something about it aren’t reading these comments.

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    • TJ
      October 5, 2011

      It behooves me how you could think VanSun editorial decisions are decided by Daniel and Harrison, and ranting at them is going to result in anything other than a bunch of dislikes, thus hiding and ultimately undermining your cause.

      Place your energy into affecting change where it will last. Join the protest on the streets; FB like mad; send letters to your MPs. But raging on a hockey blog. To use an appropriate vernacular: ‘Dude, that’s so not gonna work.’

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  10. cambo
    October 5, 2011

    hey Harrison, when you going to cheer for a real team. Not one with mentally weak goalie, twins with no sack and an ego maniac (kesler)????

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    • Harrison Mooney
      October 5, 2011

      Problem is a mentally weak goalie, sackless twins and an egomaniac are prerequisite archetypes for any team I cheer for.

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  11. Timmy
    October 5, 2011

    Why are people talking about occupy Wall Street in a sports blog? Unless it’s Sean Avery protesting his demotion to the AHL or Dan Ellis talking about escrow, take it to some other site like CNN, BBC, Al-jazzera, etc…

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  12. cambo
    October 5, 2011

    you forgot one other prerequisite, 0-41.

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    • JS Topher
      October 5, 2011

      Do you even understand what the words you use mean?

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  13. babs
    October 5, 2011

    Oh come on Mr. I find this photo odd. We see women objectified like this everywhere everyday.

    It is about time we see a nude man! And a “HOT” one at that. We need to see more men like Kesler!I wonder how you odd you would feel if the tables were turned…Let’s even the odds out people!Keep it coming!

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  14. By-Tor
    October 5, 2011

    I wonder if we’ll see Kesler taking things to a whole new level now: Kestreaking!

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    • Kate Fullerton
      October 5, 2011

      omg, that would be amazing…until he misses even more games because he gets arrested and thrown in jail for unlawful behaviour!! haha, like 2 see him do it tho :)

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  15. Jenny Wren
    October 5, 2011

    I really think it all too crude:
    Your showing Ryan Kesler nude
    Offended me beyond belief -
    I phoned my shrink to get relief.

    He said that I was just a prude
    And should like seeing Kesler nude.
    I said the problem is I did
    And now my psyche is all id.

    So I am feeling so ashamed
    And Ryan Kesler must be blamed,
    And you two too who write this blog
    And provoked this dialogue.

    One must conclude ’twas rather rude,
    Your showing Ryan Kesler nude.

    Jenny Wren

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    • Harrison Mooney
      October 5, 2011

      Jenny Wren, this is your finest hour.

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    • JS Topher
      October 5, 2011

      http://youtu.be/TAryFIuRxmQ

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  16. Hockey Mom
    October 5, 2011

    I doubt “Ryan Kesler has a mole on his left outer thigh” – those marks look like surgery scars to me. A reminder of how much of themselves these hockey players give to the game. Full marks from this Hockey Mom – keep up the good work, Kes!

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  17. Jason McBurney
    October 5, 2011

    My good buddy from New York just called. He’s ticked off that the front page of all the papers over there are covering Wall Street, and none of them are covering Naked Ryan Kesler.

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  18. Noodle
    October 5, 2011

    With muscles like that, its no wonder he’s so strong on the puck. Impressive.

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  19. Eric Blacha
    October 5, 2011

    I didn’t know a naked Kesler could create so much havoc. Was he the monster in Cloverfield?

    I should have known it.

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    • Eric Blacha
      October 5, 2011

      Also where is he? Looks like something from He-man and the Masters of Universe.

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  20. Michdog
    October 5, 2011

    Has MRS Kesler seen this shot?

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  21. Michdog
    October 5, 2011

    Not as hot as males from South Hampton!!! Kesler is okay!

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  22. J21
    October 5, 2011

    I know someone who’s going to be getting a call from Kelly Backes.

    Wait, too soon?

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  23. Kelly
    October 6, 2011

    Wow, the photo is a beautiful piece of photographic art, tastefully done with the lighting showing off an athlete’s conditioning and hard work. You would have sung a different tune had it been a female, I’m sure. I usually don’t say things like this, but, you sound like an idiot.

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  24. Qris Johnson
    October 6, 2011

    Harrison CLEARLY didn’t like this photo. If he liked it, then he woulda put a ring on it.

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  25. Noosiekins
    October 6, 2011

    i believe the official phrase is keslerbomb not keslurking

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    • Harrison Mooney
      October 6, 2011

      I would respectfully disagree. We call it Keslurking, and since we’ve been driving this meme since the very beginning, we get to call it whatever we want.

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  26. Kes
    October 6, 2011

    Apparently Kesler was at the riots too! http://twitpic.com/6w3fma

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    • Daniel Wagner
      October 6, 2011

      This is brilliant.

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