Some of you may remember the offseason-amplified controversy over Mike Duco’s Twitter account, in which it was learned that the newly-acquired Vancouver winger had made some incendiary tweets regarding the Stanley Cup finalist Canucks prior to being traded to them. In a heel turn of epic proportions, we featured these tweets on the blog, which led to a surge of vitriol directed Mike Duco’s way, which led to the unfortunate deletion of his Twitter account, which, finally, led to a surge of vitriol directed our way.
Much of this vitriol was hilarious, but none moreso than the vendetta against PITB launched by Carolina forward Anthony Stewart (@Astew22), a former teammate of Duco’s with the Rochester Americans. The morning after tweeting, The man had to delete his twitter… #Bringback@Duco87 tell @passittobulis to write that in his blog, Stewart woke up still angry, and proceeded to name July 15, 2011, National don’t pass it to Bulis day, (a holiday we are certain to observe in the coming years). I’d rather dump in on a breakaway than pass it to Bulis, Stewart wrote, then proceeded to use this same basic formula for a lengthy series of scathing tweets.
Needless to say, we were sufficiently scathed (and Jan Bulis might have been too, but, luckily for him, the holiday never made it to Chelyabinsk). But it wasn’t all bad — little did Anthony Stewart know that, he was effectively writing us a guest post, which he is welcome to do for us any time. That in mind, I present “12 things Anthony Stewart would rather do than pass it to Bulis,” a guest post by Anthony Stewart.
1 I’d rather sit in the box for 3 days and watch the green men than pass it to Bulis.
– Ed. note: Is that so? Let the record show that Anthony Stewart =/= Glenn Healy.
2 I’d rather get dangled by Datsyuk (again) than pass it to Bulis.
3 I’d rather play the trap than pass it to Bulis.
4 I’d rather get dummied by Glass, Rypien and @BizNasty2point0 at the same time than pass it to Bulis.
– Ed. note: Not sure how this is possible, but I agree.
5 I’d rather have my head down at [Rogers Arena] and have #13 hit me than pass it to Bulis.
– Ed. note: Brent Seabrook begs to differ.
6 I’d rather panhandle outside the Roxy on a Wednesday morning than pass it to Bulis.
7 I’d rather be over the cap and play 9 forwards and 5 D vs the Wings than pass it to Bulis.
– Ed. note: And with that, Anthony Stewart will never be welcome in Calgary.
8 I’d rather be the sweat rag in the Call On Me video than pass it to Bulis.
– Ed. note: Pfft. I’m sure a lot of guys would.
9 I’d rather get kicked off the national water polo team than pass it to Bulis.
– Ed. note: Zing.
10 I’d rather have Rebecca Black make a song about the rest of the week than pass it to Bulis.
– Ed. note: Me too. I’m still unclear as to the functions of Monday through Wednesday. A new song might help to clear things up.
11 I’d rather have Mike Duco watch my performance and tweet about it than pass it to Bulis.
– Ed. note: Wouldn’t we all. #BringBackDuco
12 I’d rather play ringette than pass it to Bulis.
– Ed. note: I imagine this factored into Stewart’s decision to sign with the Hurricanes.