With last night’s stunning comeback victory, the Detroit Red Wings have forced a game seven in their series with the San Jose Sharks. This means that the Canucks won’t know who their Western Conference Final opponent is until
But who would they prefer to face? PITB takes a look at their two potential opponents, weighing the pros and cons for each, in another segment of This Guy or This Guy.
[ SJS ] – While getting the puck from the Red Wings can be a chore, San Jose leads the postseason in giveaways.
[DET] – They also generate a lot of takeaways, such as when they acquired Dany Heatley, Joe Thornton, and Dan Boyle for next to nothing. Ryan Kesler could be playing for them by the end of the series.
[DET] – The Sharks are a much bigger team.
[ SJS ] – Bigger does not always mean stronger. For instance, rumour has it that Patrick Marleau is completely hollow.
[DET] – The Sharks have four Olympic gold medalists and an Art Ross winner.
[ SJS ] – The Canucks have four Olympic gold medalists and two Art Ross winners. Instant win.
[DET] – When it comes to regular season and Olympic accomplishments, however, Detroit’s roster simply doesn’t measure up.
[ SJS ] – Detroit has a bit playoff experience, though.
[ SJS ] – Detroit scores when it counts.
[DET] – Detroit counts their age in scores.
[ SJS ] – Detroit has the heart of a champion.
[DET] – It’s an artificial pacemaker.
[ SJS ] – Detroit has Nicklas Lidstrom, perhaps the greatest defenseman of his generation.
[DET] – And the last two generations. If you read the right spell from the Book of the Dead, he may return to his sarcophagus.
[DET] – Did I mention Detroit is old and enfeebled? They may wear down as the series goes along.
[ SJS ] – The older they look, the more often Dan “Community Man” Hamhuis may find himself continually out of position as he tries to help them cross the neutral zone.
[ SJS ] – San Jose recently frittered away a 3-0 series lead. They clearly lack killer instinct.
[DET] – So did the Canucks. A Vancouver-San Jose series would be so devoid of killer instinct, it could go on for nine games.
[ SJS ] – The San Jose Sharks have a reputation as chronic chokers. A little adversity and they may crumble.
[DET] – If the Sharks begin to choke, Dan Hamhuis may take a lot of holding penalties as he tries to clear the blocked airway with abdominal thrusts.
[ SJS ] – For as good as Ryan Kesler’s been, Pavel Datsyuk’s been almost as good.
[DET] – Unlike the Sharks, the Canucks might try to defend him.
[ SJS ] – Detroit’s Pavel Datsyuk has gotten the best of Ryan Kesler in consecutive years.
[DET] – None of the games will be played in Las Vegas.
[ SJS ] – The Red Wings have a history of winning.
[DET] – So does Charlie Sheen. A meltdown may be imminent.
[DET] – Detroit has a Swedish captain. He can’t possibly lead his team to a Stanley Cup.
[ SJS ] – Wait, he already did once? Then the secret to winning a cup is having a Swedish captain. Vancouver 1, San Jose 0.
[DET] – Detroit forward and former Canuck Todd Bertuzzi hasn’t been the same since he broke the neck of Steve Moore.
[ SJS ] – San Jose forward and former Canuck Kyle Wellwood hasn’t been the same since he broke the spine of his limited edition, hardcover copy of Hitchiker’s Guide.
[ SJS ] – Detroit coach Mike Babcock has been to the Stanley Cup finals three times in seven seasons.
[DET] – But he’s never won a Jack Adams. He must be terrible.
[DET] – San Jose’s goaltender, Antti Niemi, won the Stanley Cup last year.
[ SJS ] – Chicago didn’t care. Vancouver probably shouldn’t either.
[ SJS ] – Detroit has shown a startling penchant for tying up games in the third period, something the Canucks have had trouble preventing in the second round.
[DET] – Detroit tends to shoot from in front of the net, where Roberto Luongo is better at making the save.Tags: Questionable Comedic Content, Red Wings, Sharks, this guy or this guy